pam asks:
I find this subject fascinating as well as puzzling. Why would a mother choose to never put her baby to her breast, choosing a machine that makes an obnoxious noise with plastic on her breasts over the sweet comforting warmth and smell of her own baby? 

I agree that it is hard for some of us to understand why a mom feels this way.  We have to remember that when a mom has an aversion, emotional or physical, to putting baby to her breast, it is something that has most likely developed over her whole lifetime.  It is not something that suddenly apeared overnight.  It is deeply engrained and won't "go away" simply by telling her how much nicer it is to have baby at the breast than plastic.  It may have roots in a negative experience she has had in her past.  It may stem from continuing input that breasts are first, foremost and even exclusively sexual organs.  I wonder if for some there may be a neurological reason for hypersensitivity that doesn't react as strongly to plastic as to skin contact.  I'm sure there are many other factors that lead a woman to this choice-probably often a combination of factors some of which she may be aware of and some she may not be able to identify.
It's great that you accepted her where she was.   This is especially challenging when we have a hard time understanding why she is where she is.  I am a little concerned when people say, in effect, that we have to avoid "promoting" this 3rd option.  If we were to ask a mom "breast bottle or EP?" are we "promoting" EP any more than "promoting bottle (formula) by the posing the question without the 3rd option?  I'm not saying we should do that from the start, but I think all too often we wait too long or never mention it unless the mom brings it up.  While a few moms might go this route rather than persevere with overcoming breastfeeding challenges, I think we lose far more to artificial feeding when we avoid it completely.  As with anything else, we need to help her become fully informed so she can make an informed choice.  In addition to knowing why human milk is so good for her baby regardless of the route, We need to inform her of the ways EP differs from direct nursing and the amount of work involved.  We need to let her know that it is possible and point her to resources such as the EP group on iVillage where she can learn from and get support from other moms with that experience.

I realy enjoyed doing the presentation and learned a great deal myself.  If there is interest out there, I would like to develop it further for other audiences.  Do you think there is a "market" for this?

Winnie

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