Two things that have worked for older babies in my practice:

start modifying bottle feeding so it uses similar oral behaviors as 
bresatfeeding:
cross the nipple across the baby's lips so he has to open wide for it 
and latch onto it
hold the baby in a sidelying position facing mom (she can work toward 
this gradually). The bottle is then horizontal, which neutralizes flow 
and encourages the baby to use his tongue.

Then try removing mom's clothing little by little. Raising her shirt so 
he is against her tummy, then opening the bra and letting his face touch 
her breast while he takes the bottle.

Then try a nipple shield at breast, prefilled with milk by either hand 
expression or squirting milk into the nipple shield holes with a curved 
tip (periodontal) syringe. If baby puts his mouth on the shield at all, 
he'll get an instant reward of milk. Don't try it when he's starving 
hungry, and don't push, just offer gently and encouragingly.

She can also do lots of skin to skin comforting between feedings.

Catherine Watson Genna, IBCLC  NYC

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