Dear Rebbecca,
You put it so well.
"If you are not
sensitive to a Mother's ideals and morals you can not truly help her, IMHO."
There is a quote from a UNICEF publication which says the same thing in different words:
"They won't care how much you know until they know how much you care."
It's vitally important to our effectiveness as a profession that we listen to the mom's concerns FIRST. Her needs may not line up with our agenda, and that's something we have to accept.
Martha Johnson RN IBCLC
Eugene OR
USA
-----Original Message-----
From: Rebbecca Rosen, RNC, BSN [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
Sent: Tuesday, April 26, 2005 3:01 PM
Subject: Meeting Moms where they are
I have been reading the thread here on lactnet about the nursing covers with
much interest. I must preface all of what I am about to say with the
statement that I do sell these types of items and do have a financial interest in
them. My main concern with the thread is that I do not feel that we are
remembering where some of these women are in their lives. I remember quite
strongly what it was like to breastfeed in public with my first nursling. I was
petrified. We were still learning from each other. I was still having
anxiety coupled with perspiration, palpitations, and a racing pulse any time my
newborn would start crying when he was hungry. If was in public I was so
worried about getting him latched on correctly without completely exposing my
breast. I do understand that we should not have to worry about this. I do
understand that if I sell these items I may be giving Moms the message that they
should be covering themselves up. I do not want to give this message. But, I
do know that to help a Mother you must meet her where she is in her life. I
learned this in nursing school and never forgot it. If you are not
sensitive to a Mother's ideals and morals you can not truly help her, IMHO. If you
expect a new Mother to go out in public and latch her baby on while exposing
her entire breast (which may be how she is doing it in the beginning) while
she is not comfortable with this, I think we run the risk of causing this
Mother to feel that BF is "not for her." I think we simplify things when we say
that women should just BF in public with no reservation. Unfortunately, we
don't live in a society that supports this. By all means a woman should be
encouraged to BF in public and should discuss her options on how to do this so
SHE is comfortable. I know some of you must have steam coming out of your
ears right now. I just feel that sometimes we who want to do so much for
breastfeeding want to skip over the baby steps that might be needed to making BF
what it should be-free and open. FYI- I never used a cover but my son and I
did sweat buckets under blankets for a few months. That is what I needed to
get through the time when I didn't know if BF was for me.
Rebbecca Rosen RN, BSN, CBC
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