Oh, that pep talk. Do I ever "feel your pain." One of the trickiest parts
about having a private practice as a lactation consultant is this very
issue: Mom and Dad are at the end of their rope by the time they get to
you. The IBCLC has arrived and is going to fix it all RIGHT NOW! Often, we
are suggesting to exhausted and frightened parents very labor- and
energy-intensive care plans (waking-to-feed, pumping, breast compression,
skin-to-skin, cup feeding, etc. etc.).
Somewhere towards the end of the consult, hopefully when the baby is
snuggling after whatever method of feeding we have just accomplished, I
gently discuss how one must put this into perspective.
For me, the most effective tack goes something like this:
(1) I acknowledge that this is agony for the parents ("every day seems like
72 hours right now");
(2) But, there is light at the end of the tunnel ("look at how well your
baby took sips from that cup!");
(3) They *can* commit 24 or 48 hours to the care plan ("just put everything
else aside right now, and tell yourselves that for one day, your
one-and-only job is this baby. The laundry will be here when you get
back.") [Now -- bear with me. I am well aware that an effective care plan
may require days or weeks of work (and LC follow-up). But during my pep
talk, I am addressing a stressed-out couple, often first-timers, who are
feeling totally overwhelmed. It helps to be reminded that whatever needs
fixing gets fixed one step at a time.]
(4) Lastly, this is a drop in the bucket of time, overall. ("Think about
it: it took nine months for your baby to get here ... he is only 5 days old
now. Let's give him a chance.")
I usually get that "nodding head" on the last point. Even tired Moms and
Dads "get it" that some things take a little time to learn properly.
Liz Brooks, JD, IBCLC
Wyndmoor, PA, USA
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