I can almost guarantee that the "Dad needs to give a bottle so baby
can bond" idea will come up in nearly every BF class and in at least
half of the postpartum teaching sessions.  I always bring it up
myself in the classes as part of my "how is dad important to the BF
baby" discussion.  (And at least half to 3/4 of the dads do attend
the class with mom.  Always fun to watch how the first arrivals look
around a little fearfully until they see another dad or I assure
them that in the 12+ years I have been teaching the class, there was
only 1 time that only 1 dad came.)

One thing I like to point out is that babies are smarter than we
usually give them credit.  Baby probably figures out pretty quick
that the source of its nutrition with a bottle is the container, not
the person behind it!  In other words, baby bonds to the bottle
regardless of who's holding it.  I make a strong push for dads who
want an important role in baby's care to consider taking over the
bath as one way to "bond" with baby.  Just like breastfeeding, it
may feel a little awkward at first, but with practice, it can be a
very fun, interactive time with baby.  It can be his exclusive
"hands on" time with baby while breastfeeding is mom's exclusive
"hands on" time.  The potential problem would be if dad wanted the
bath time as often as mom gets the breast time!  I also refer to a
couple cases I've seen where mom has had to be on complete bedrest
after delivery but did not want to sacrifice the breastfeeding.  In
both cases that come to mind, Dad did everything with baby except
the actual act of nursing.  When I asked who had more "hands on"
time with baby, Mom or Dad, the answer was a quick, unhesitating
"Dad does".

I remember years ago hearing a mom describe how a family member
(from somewhere out of the US) asked if she could "nurse" the baby.
Mom was taken aback until she realized that in that person's
culture, to "nurse" meant to hold, cuddle, and generally care for
the infant, not just to feed at breast.  So dads can certainly nurse
their babies, they just can't breastfeed them!

Winnie

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