> I feel so sorry for the baby who has a daddy unwilling to set aside his
pride
> and 'needs' for the good of his child. Letting his jealousy take control
is
> not 'fatherly' behavior at all.  And sometimes, I think that jealousy is
not
> about mom and baby, but about baby and mom.  You know---jealous of the
baby, not
> so much wanting to be part of the baby's feedings, just not liking that
mom
> loves this baby so much and he is not the one she is doting on.  Sometimes
no
> matter what, the dad doesn't care.  He wants to feed the baby, period.
That is
> not love, that is control.  Control over the mother's relationship with
the
> baby, control over the baby.  No.  Not about love at all.
>

When I read the father's email, this was my reaction. I felt very
uncomfortable with the metaphor he used - something about him having been
"the understudy" and then getting a chance to be the star and now we want
him to be "the understudy" again. This is not at all about the baby's needs
or what is good for the baby. This sounds as though it is about someone who
wants to be the centre of attention.

Teresa Pitman
Guelph, Ontario

             ***********************************************

To temporarily stop your subscription: set lactnet nomail
To start it again: set lactnet mail (or digest)
To unsubscribe: unsubscribe lactnet
All commands go to [log in to unmask]

The LACTNET mailing list is powered by L-Soft's renowned
LISTSERV(R) list management software together with L-Soft's LSMTP(R)
mailer for lightning fast mail delivery. For more information, go to:
http://www.lsoft.com/LISTSERV-powered.html