Gail,

I was one of those moms with a sick babe.  He died after only 8
hours of life.  The feeling you describe, numbness, is right on.  I
think it's got to be nature's defense for the moms in this situation.

I am a LLLL.  I breastfed #1 for nearly 2 years.  She weaned when I
was 6 months pg with the baby who died (self led).  It really never
occured to me to pump or nurse during the time he was alive.  He was
*very* sick obviously.  He really barely moved, never opened his eyes,
had no rooting reflexes.  I didn't even get to see him until he was
about 5 hours old (emergency c/s, eclampsia... not a pretty scene).
I think that nurses and doctors need to remind moms in these situations
of what they may want to do, because I doubt most moms will be with it
enough at that point to think for themselves.

I have to say that the milk that I had was a real source of anguish for
me.  I had loads of it, and it was so strange,  It was like I was
attached to it, because it was a reminder of my precious baby that I
lost.  I didn't want to let go of my last physical reminder of him.
I'm sure it sounds strange but I doubt it's a unique feeling.

You sound like a really caring doctor Gail!  Wish I'd have had you during
our crisis.


Regards,

Wendy Funk, epidemiologist, LLLL and most importnat,  MOM