Pearl,

What a heart-wrenching tale! If this mom wants to do this panel, she may see
it as something positive she can do in memory of her baby. It could be both
healing and empowering for her.

I would discuss with her what she can expect from this group, and maybe work
out with her exactly how she would like to be introduced. If she wanted you
to, you could even gently lay out for the group any areas she just isn't
comfortable dealing with, or at least explain to the group that she has been
through a lot and will answer to the extent she feels comfortable.

I would hope that this group would be sensitive to this woman and all she
has gone through without even needing any kind of warning or prompting. And
at the same time, she has a story to tell that shouldn't be watered down
just for fear of upsetting her. Talking about something like that is part of
the healing process. To ignore it doesn't make it go away any sooner.

Let us know what she (and you) decide and how it goes. And, no, I don't
think you are being "selfish" for wanting her to tell her story--especially
since it was her idea.

Melissa Vickers, IBCLC
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