When my eldest was born, 20 years ago, my cesarean was unexpected. I asked
my baby be handed to me while they closed. The doc told me that the baby
would be too "sleepy" to breastfeed (something she assured me wouldn't be a
problem when she was trying to convince me to have the surgery) but my son
was sucking his fist on the table, so this time, I demanded my son be given
to me. 

I have photos of him laying on my strapped down arm, nursing away with the
sterile field up and the surgeon visible above the field, still stitching. 

It was a moment of triumph, because I was so incredibly disappointed with
the whole birth thing. He stayed with me until I was ready for him to be
laid down because I was so incredibly tired and was afraid to sleep with
him. I lost that fear after a few weeks. 

Losing that momentum from birth to breastfeeding, no matter how the baby is
born, can affect the mother and baby for a long, long time. I fear that some
mothers never truly develop "ownership" of their child, and that can be
reflected in society and how many children seem to be lost from their
mothers.

Best wishes,
Sam Doak 

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