Jan says:
"I'd be interested in seeing what the consequences are in adults who were
schedule fed -- with all the ramifications of that type of parenting
behavior...and if there are any perceived differences in those who were
"attachment -- or, as Cathy put it, "regular" parented."

OK, down to the nitty-gritty here: I was "regular-parented". I was breastfed
(in the early '50s, when such a thing was considered bizarre), and my mother
figured out early on to feed us when we seemed hungry rather than by those
stupid rules. So I'm a Spock-generation baby (that's Dr., not Mister), but
was not raised particularly "permissively", just with good sense and love,
and with expectations that I would behave properly, wear clean underpants
every day, not break wind in public, and be polite to grown-ups. (To my sibs
too, in fact, which seemed a bit much at the time but seems to have paid off
well.)We were expected to do what was expected of us, but were always
supported when we needed to challenge unreasonable authority; we weren't
expected to blindly obey, or to bow to authority just because it was there,
but we were expected to be scrupulously morally honest and to examine
ourselves closely to figure out what was "really important" to us, vs. what
was a whim or a passing occasion for being a wise-ass. We didn't have TV
till I was older (maybe 10 or so), and when we did we were monitored and
restricted in our viewing, because my mother was pretty sure too much or the
wrong kind would "turn your brain into oatmeal". My mother didn't give a
hoot that this was unheard-of among my friends - guess she was well-parented
too!

As a teen-ager, I thought I suffered mightily because my parents wanted to
know where I was, with whom, & doing what. Hah!

There has never been a day in my life when I didn't know that I was
completely and unconditionally loved. Even when I did some pretty stupid
stuff, or got the occasional spanking with the hairbrush. I had no idea how
rare and priceless such an upbringing was till I became a grown-up myself
and began to see into other people's lives more.

Have you all seen that cartoon with a picture of a big almost-empty
auditorium, only a couple of people scattered through the room, and the
banner announcing the "Adult Children of Normal Parents Convention"?

cathy Bargar

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