First the rant...

Got a call on Sunday 8am from the mother of an 11 week old baby girl. Baby was
thriving, nursing going well. Mother is going back to work in two weeks, full-time,
and wants to continue nursing while at home, possibly pumping while at work. The
problem? The father insisted that the baby learns to take a bottle NOW - he spent 12
hours of the previous day *practicing* with her - i.e., offering a bottle and
refusing to let her nurse. Eventually he gave in, and the poor baby nursed for a few
minutes before dropping off to sleep, after crying all day. Mother tried to explain
to him that the baby would prolly be more receptive after her belly was full and she
was calmer, but he wouldn't listen. After I talked to the mom, talked to the dad,
but it was obviously going in one ear and out the other. Yes, I used all the *I*
messages, etc., but he just didn't want to hear it. He said, *Well, she is just
going to have to learn, isn't she?* and went right on forcing the bottle into the
poor baby's mouth. I could hear the screams....

I called back two days later. The mother answered in a very *flat* voice. The baby
was weaned to a bottle, and she was no longer nursing. We talked about expressing
enough to be comfortable etc., but I could hear her husband's voice in the
background, and she obviously didn't want to talk. This was very scary. Telling her
to just answer yes or no, I asked her if her husband had ever threatened or abused
her. She was very indignant - no way! They were a Christian family!

Sigh :(

Did this constitute child abuse? What else could I have done?


Now for the raves :)

rave #2
I was out shopping, when I ran into a mother I had helped three years ago. At that
time she was 41 years old, pregnant with her first child after years of infertility.
Her questions were all about which pump to buy (she was planning on staying home).
Gave her lots of info about how bf works, positioning, etc.. She came to a couple of
LLL meetings, and decided that she didn't need a pump after all, since she only
planned to nurse for six months, tops.

When I saw her the other day, she was pregnant with her second child, due in
November, and still happily nursing her now three year old! This time the questions
were about tandem nursing...:))

rave #2
A mother called to thank me for suggesting that she ask her doctor for references
about when to wean. He had told her that babies nursed past a year all had
psychological problems....When challenged to produce the studies, he backed down to
*that's what I learned in medical school thirty years ago* and *the other children
will tease him about nursing*. This mother assured her doctor that none of the
children her son (now 2 years old) played with would tease him, since they are all
still nursing too! :))


Norma Ritter IBCLC, LLLL
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"If not now, when? If not us, who?" R. Hillel