Following is a much-needed rant and request for assistance:

I just got off the phone with a client who reports that her milk is "gone";
baby is 5 months old.  She is a primip and is Korean, as is baby's father.
Male baby was 7 lb 8 oz at birth and is now approx 15 lbs. There are so
many problems here that I don't know where to start! Let's see. Her doctor
has been telling her to feed no more than every 3-4 hours and has insisted
that she stop sleeping with the baby; he gave her a copy of WTETFY and
pointed out the information it contains about the importance of schedules
and putting the baby in a crib and "teaching" them to sleep on their own;
dr. has told her that the baby is "too small" and that she should start
solids (iron-fortified cereal and jarred baby food) and supplement with
formula. She did this but reports that the baby wouldn't take the bottle of
formula, spit up the cereal (she couldn't express enough bm to mix, so she
used water), and seemed to like the baby food a little. She is still trying
to nurse but reports that he becomes fussy after about 5 minutes.

Her mother and sister, who live 2 hrs away (somewhat thankfully) asked at a
recent visit why she was "still" nursing since her milk "had no more
nutrients in it anyway" at 5 months. The father, who is big as Asians go
(5'11" and over 200 lb, I believe) is questioning his wife's ability to
"properly" feed the baby since he isn't big and plump like a friend's baby
(also Korean and bf) is.  Sigh.  This poor mother has tried to get info
from everywhere and it all seems to conflict with what she wants to do, and
she is seriously doubting her own ability now as well. Fortunately, I am
extremely familiar with Korean culture, having studied the Korean martial
art Tae Kwon Do for 9 years (am a 2nd degree black belt) from a Korean
master, even studied in Korea, and the mom seemed to really open up to me
when I told her this. First time I've even linked bf and TKD, that's for
sure!

My rant is about this doctor. He and others in his practice have
consistently sabotaged bf for nearly every mother in their care for years
and years. This mom, like others I've talked to, called and asked if there
was anyone in town she could talk to about getting bf advice and support;
they said there wasn't anyone. She called the hospital. Same thing. She
even switched to another doctor in the same clinic and the problem got
worse; this guy tried to get her to come to the office and pick up a case
of formula! She only got our phone number when she went to the grocery
store to buy some formula and stood crying in the formula aisle; a female
employee saw her and asked what was wrong. She sobbed that she was trying
to breastfeed and she needed help, and she didn't want to feed her baby
formula!  The store employee knew me (I shop there and often use my totebag
with a bf logo as my bag) and told her to call me right away, so she did!
How's that for a stroke of luck...

She appears extremely uninformed about infant care, diet and nutrition,
everything, and has been trying to go by the WTETFY book she was given :-(
She is not on WIC; I mentioned the program to her and she didn't even know
what it was. She confused at this point and needs some real help; problem
is, I should be working WITH her doctor, not trying to (gently) counteract
everything he says! I've addressed the problems as best I can for now; I
hope I will see her this Saturday. I want to give her some handouts on
dehydration and re-building her supply. (I'd kind of like to give her a
hug, too).

The chair of my bf support group has asked me to write a letter to the
doctor, re-introducing Woman to Woman and talking about how we'd like to
work with him on bf management cases. He has been visited by us before, and
he does know we're here (we've given him reams of literature and piles of
our cards), so I just don't know how to phrase this letter.

I hope I am making some sense and apologize for the length, but I'd really
like to go to this guy's office and take him out in the parking lot! ;-))
Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.

Calmer now,

Nancy Kramer