I encourage written feedback to physicians (and any other health
professional) who behave inappropriately.  I recommend that the couple
write a letter to the physician that states what happened, then states
their objections to the behavior.  If they want to pose a question (eg what
are your references to support your statement that everything will be
messed up....), that is appropriate.  The letter should end with a request
for an action - an apology, corrective action (eg you should read the
following articles, books, etc and make the following change in your
behavior), and request a reply in writing to specific questions or
requests.   Do not discuss money in the letter.  Keep a copy.

If the doctor does not reply in a reasonable time, call the county medical
society and ask how to complain about a physician's behavior.  There should
be a board of ethics.  If the physician is employed (by an HMO, clinic, or
medical school), the step before the county medical society may be to the
physician's boss.

I recommend that we all start writing letters telling doctors specifically
what we don't like about their behavior.  They rarely get feedback, and
even more rarely get a specific request for change.  Often the only
feedback they do get is a lawsuit, and the behaviors that don't cause
high-dollar damages are ignored.

I have recently embarked on the path I described, and it's getting results.
If the couple in the post wants to email me privately, I would be happy to
help them.

Julie Graves Moy, M.D., M.P.H.           [log in to unmask]
http://www.realtime.net/~jgmoy
512-397-9521 office
P.O. Box 4768                       512-342-1624  home
Austin, Texas  78765           512-342-1628 fax