I really feel for the mom who was abused herself and is determined to
meet all of her child's needs.  It is a noble quest, but fraught with
impossiblities...like when he wants something that HE knows he needs, but
will make something else that he needs tomorrow (a sane mom) impossible.
 The mom needs to balance out teething, growth spurts, lack of daytime
nursing/extra night nursing with handing baby off to Dad for an hour
while she sleeps, blissfully alone, and carrying/holding the baby
herself, without nursing.

I have noticed that many committed, invested, attached parents forget
that nursing is not the only way to comfort a baby.  They always say (I
say it, too, when I forget...), "I don't want to leave him alone to cry".
 I firmly agree, but there is an alternative.  Holding the baby while
offering a substitute.  You KNOW he's not hungry, and resolve to go for a
walk, with the baby in a sling, while the baby wails, then you get home
and nurse, and after a few days, baby figures out walking is fun...You
got what you wanted, baby wasn't alone, never felt unloved
(misunderstood, maybe, but that won't go away, until after he fine tunes
that feeling as a teenager!), and finally learns that there IS another
way to be comforted.  I have done this with success (but not every time),
and I feel good that I didn't leave my baby alone, and since I simply
couldn't do what the baby wanted, every single minute, and survive (we
needed supper, and I need some sleep...), my babies all learned that the
cloth backpack or sling were comfortable places to be.  I find that a
cloth-tie-'em-on African/Morocco or Robozzo style works better than a
frame pack, both for closeness and Mom's comfort (really, low tech is
more comfortable.  hard to believe!)

Colleen Humphreys