Ok, I've waited 5 days on this, hoping I'd get over it. Last Wednesday
night was our local LLL meeting. I've got the pump depot in town, so I
always go to these. I was late, and the meeting was close to closing
when I got there. Our Leader was sitting down with the pregnant moms
to give them a latch-on demonstration with her doll. Everyone was
wearing nametags (I was introduced verbally), and I recognized in the
group of four pregnant moms the name of a twin mom that the Leader had
referred to me (I'm also the twin rep). I had called this young woman
but had only gotten her machine.
She was not paying attention to the Leader's demonstration and got up
to talk to me. After a few conversational openers, she said that the
Leader had told her she had the wrong pump (she had already purchased a
G-----). I asked her what she needed a pump for and she said that her
twins were going to be premature and low birthweight. I must admit
that she barely looked pregnant, let alone 8 months along with twins.
Then she asked what the long term cost was for the piston pumps. I
asked her if she was planning to return to work, and then it came out
that she was not planning to bring the babies to breast EVER! She was
planning to pump her milk and feed the babies by bottle, because she
was going to have "lots of help." Where do people *get* ideas like
this?
She claimed she had talked it over with the folks at the WIC office
and they thought it was a good idea (I'm *sure* she didn't talk to the
LC on staff at WIC). I was sure the LLL Leader hadn't elicited this
information. I told her that while I would certainly rent her a pump,
it would be less time consuming for her to actually nurse (all the
while thinking frantically, how can I convince her this is a
*mistake*?) I begged her to do a few things before she solidified her
decision. I recommended that this young woman read Mothering Multiples
by Gromada, that she talk to the LLL Leader, that she talk to the LC on
staff at WIC. She said she would do these things. Back home I called
the Leader and apprised her of the situation, and she assured me she
would inform the WIC LC. I sent mom-to-be my standard packet of A-E
info sheets, along with a reassuring note.
I don't think I forgot anything, and while counseling is not my strong
suit, I don't think I made any mistakes. I just can't believe that
this young woman actually believes that pumping and feeding by bottle
is preferable to nursing (yes I have been reading the posts about
abuse, I believe it happens). I know there are lots of people out
there with lots more experience than I have. Does this ever get
easier? Does anybody ever get used to it? I'm so shocked and saddened
by the whole thing (and hoping we don't lose her before the babies
come).
Of course there are clients like the couple that came to me for mother
to mother (and father) support in the first 4 days postpartum, now
their 5 week old has developed reflux so severe the baby was
hospitalized for several days and now the parents are renting a piston
pump, preparing for return to breast. I know there are bright spots,
but when things are crazy they just seem *so* crazy.
Susan Betz
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