Loved your two posts on this, Laura - the one with your way of talking
about fat content to mothers, and the one about how mothers seem to
try to control the process if they have scientific information.

I don't find that 'scientific' information is the factor determining
whether mothers try to get control of breastfeeding but I do find that
mothers who want to be able to plan exactly when, how often and for
how long the baby is going to feed are the ones who struggle to adjust
to life with a baby. They will attempt to use whatever is at hand to
get control of things, from the latest impeccable scientific
information about lactation physiology, to outdated advice not to
spoil the baby by responding to its cues even when they are aching to
pick the baby up for their own sake. Mothers who are able to just be
with their babies and do whatever it takes to keep them happy, seem to
enjoy their newborns a lot more. It's a specific skill, akin to what a
good midwife does with pregnant, laboring and postpartum women, IMO
:-)

I see health care staff reinforcing this mechanistic view, often
without intending to, when their view of breastfeeding is purely
dietary - breastfeeding provides calories and nutrients for a baby and
they need a certain minimum amount of it in a 24 hour period.  True,
but this describes only a tiny part of what breastfeeding is for
mothers and for babies. Like telling someone how to braid the hairs on
the end of an elephant's tail and thinking you have taught them
everything they need to know to care for their elephant for the rest
of its life.

Babies are great teachers if we are just 'lazy' (or BRAVE) enough to
relax and let them show us how it works. Learning to let go of the
need to control is about the most important thing new parents can do
and breastfeeding is a perfect way to experience it.

Rachel Myr
Kristiansand, Norway

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