Yasmin writes:
I am also beginning to see a correlation between evening fussiness/crying
of baby and not being able to cluster feed for nutrition and comfort. What
do others think?
~~~
I think this is a point worth looking at: when a person does not get their
needs met, why do we label them "fussy"? There is so much reframing to be
done: A baby who is seeking the breast has a need, and when their need is
not met, they respond, they ask/tell us louder or more obviously what they
need. When we deny it, or ignore it, or try other things that will not meet
it, we cannot label them "fussy". They are "hungry". There are all kinds of
hunger, yes? There are all kinds of things that happen naturally when a
baby goes to breast, as was pointed out. And they are giving the mom the
opportunity to access relaxation and connection as well. When we break the
process down, the system doesn't function. Bottles for food/hydration, pacifiers
for sucking/calming, these things being to replace the holistic behavior
that is a mom and baby's "default" setting at this tender time in their
lives. One thing I find myself doing a lot is trying to help parents see that
their baby is healthy and competent, asking for something important, and we
don't always have to know the exact nature, we just know that many times,
breastfeeding will meet whatever the need(s) is/are. I suggest that anyone
who is hungry, in need of something, should protest when they don't get it.
:) Don't we want our children to know they matter, and they are much better
prepared for life if they know this? It's not spoiling, it's everyone
being valued, and balances and capabilities shift as befits their stage of life.
Peace,
Judy
Judy LeVan Fram, PT, IBCLC, LLLL
Brooklyn, NY, USA
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