Ayelet writes:
 
"They stayed a little too cheery for comfort. I now
feel responsible for  this little baby and can't ignore what I know....
In my prenantal class I dedicate a whole portion to "How to know the baby  
is
getting enough". Weight gain, red flags etc. How could this have  happened?
How could I have made it more clear?"
 
~~~
I bet you made it abundantly clear. Since I fell behind on LN I got to read 
 the many supportive emails on this post-line. Referring back to the ped is 
often  the hardest part ( in our area anyway) because the problem  
originates there for many families. Although once in a while I see a baby  failing  
despite the pediatrician identifying an issues it's more  often not this 
way.  The problem is, many parents go to their pediatrician,  and at multiple 
visits hear things like: ( these are examples from recent moms  in the last 
week I've seen, many from ONE poor mom...)
: some babies get off to a slow start
: he's fine, just keep trying
: and I quote: "you are not a human pacifier, do not feed your baby more  
than every 3 hours" ( from an "LC" the pedi recommended who is not an LC but 
a  midwife and doula)
: it's great your baby is sleeping 6 hours straight already ( in a baby who 
 gained 2 oz in 2 weeks between weeks 2 and 4 and cried every minute he 
wasn't  shut down)
: And I quote" You cannot always make your baby happy, you know, babies  
cry"
 
One baby was born at 36 weeks and mom was given no information that this  
might have an impact, one baby had a very obvious tongue tie when he cried 
and  almost no tongue extension,elevation or power when trying to feed, you 
get  the picture. In an effort not to set off "perfection-seeking" parents, 
some  practices actively discourage just about any concern a mom has about her 
crying,  slow or no gaining baby.
 
I feel your pain, is all I can say. Some of these parents have no other  
source of info as "strong" as the voice of the MD, no matter what. Most  when 
they meet with me, get pretty angry, or start blaming themselves for not  
listening to their instincts. I praise them for knowing something needed to  
be addressed, and for keeping their babies healthy despite misinformation of  
this kind. The cognitive dissonance has got to be painful. I really feel  
for them.
 
Peace,
Judy
 
 
Judy LeVan  Fram, PT, IBCLC, LLLL
Brooklyn, NY,  USA
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