Hello all,
Another situation where mothers just don't get the info they need from
appropriate sources, or can't/won't hear it.
Mom with 2 month old who stopped breathing over the weekend while just
being held on parent's lap. Baby worked up in ER, no findings. I remind her
that it's good baby is in bassinet in bedroom since baby's sleep best and
most safely in sensory nearness to their moms. Mom's plan after the apnea
incident is to transition baby to crib alone in another room. I explain she
might want to reconsider the timing of that since sleeping nearby is much
more likely to be safer, especially if baby stops breathing again. She
counters ( as she always does with everything I say, she once told me she couldn't
consider CST for her baby's feeding issues because a baby in Europe had
died going to an uncertified practitioner....) that it wouldn't matter because
she isn't awake all night watching the baby anyway, so she still wouldn't
know if the baby had stopped breathing. I say that whether awake or asleep,
their bodies are talking and responding to each other, and just being
nearby makes it less likely, but no nothing is guaranteed. She is concerned
that she will "never get the baby to be independent" if she doesn't move her
soon. I tell her that highest risk of SIDS is between 2 and 4 months, and
she sounds like she might actually consider not moving the baby out so soon.
If I didn't know this mom, having been working with her for weeks, I
wouldn't have pushed back as hard with the countering and ongoing info, but I
thought, if something happens to this baby, and no one told this mother that
she might have made a difference by following the AAP recommendations (
which have no real information attached to them in terms of timeframe so moms
keep the baby nearby for a month or two and then it's out they go, but
they're better than not having any at all...)... well I felt I owed it to her.
We often disagree, and I do my best to be respectful of her choices, but I
can't not tell her what she needs to know. So far, she has not stopped
talking to me...:)
Thanks for letting me vent.
Peace,
Judy
Judy LeVan Fram, PT, IBCLC, LLLL
Brooklyn, NY, USA
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