I've encountered a situation at our hospital, and I'd love your collective
wisdom on how best to handle it. A little history to explain the scenario
first. A few years ago, when I was in the nursery, a pediatrician was making
rounds with her medical students in tow. She was explaining breastfeeding to them,
and giving poor information. One comment she made was 'anyone with breast
buds, given nipple stimulation, could breastfeed. - babies included.' She went
on to say that men could breastfeed if they were willing to pump. Now, I
wasn't invited in on the conversation, so I tried to keep my frustration to myself.
The nurse kept watching me for a reaction, but I offered none. Later, we were
discussing it and a neonatologist overheard our conversation. He was outraged
that someone would provide such poor information. He requested the Dr's name,
which I supplied and the conversation ended. I thought that would be the end
of it. Later, when I'd pass him in the hallways, or nursery, he would make a
joke of it, and I let it pass. Now, however, whenever he sees me, he asks if
I've helped any men to breastfeed. I let it roll off my back, saying I'll let
him research it.
However, today was the third time, at least, that he introduced me to a new
doctor on staff, by telling him I am one of the 'breastfeeding experts' at the
hospital and that I help men to breastfeed. I try to stay professional, and
correct him saying I do no such thing. This leaves the new doctor confused and
as uncomfortable as I feel.
I do want to say, this neonatologist and I have an otherwise professional
working relationship. He holds a different religious belief than I do, and knows
that I understand and respect his beliefs. I will offer to enter the room
ahead of him to cover a nursing mother and/or stay in the room if he'd like. He's
also quite comfortable asking me to do so.
I also want to add, that I do not believe he is, in any way, meaning this as
a form of sexual harassment. I do, however, feel that it is an attempt to make
me look less intelligent and less professional.
I'm looking for a way to discreetly and professionally stop these comments
and inappropriate behavior. I don't want to make a big deal of it, and have
tried joking it off, saying that's not true etc. I feel that the comments, whether
intentional or not, are unprofessional, degrading, and attempt to make me
look less than professional. Any suggestions on how to put an end to this
behavior, without having a major disagreement? I'd like to keep (or maybe it's more
accurate to say I'd like to establish) a nice working relationship with him,
but want equal respect as well. If nothing else, I do feel a bit better for
having vented my frustration. Susan Manore, IBCLC, LLLL
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