"There is obviously more to this than is being reported. If social
workers have become involved (as is reported) then there are obviously
multiple problems with this mother (and maybe other family members).
The parents are not married (not that that matters) but that's just
another red flag with this baby. The father was in agreement with
surgery. Social workers are not brought in for absolutely no reason at
all. I am often involved with new mothers and babies within the
community and also work extensively with the Department of Children and
Families on some cases. I have yet to ever see a case where social
workers and DCF were involved where there isn't a risk of some sort."
Really? So, we always assume that one is guilty of something because
that person is accused of being guilty? When my son was in PICU, social
workers became "involved" because we had no medical insurance and they
were trying to assist us with payment. Would their involvement alert
you as a nurse in the PICU that there were multiple problems with me
and my family? Recently, I worked with a mom whose sister provided
labor support for her. Mom had become very well educated and refused
the HepB vaccine, eye drops and vit K. Social workers became "involved"
because the hospital was unable to pressure the mother into these
things and the staff tried to gain the assistance of the social worker
"to be sure the mother was making informed decisions". Funny, I never
see them grill a mother who defaults to these invasive procedures
without any education to be certain she is making "informed decisions".
No one cares that the mother is educated or informed (or married) so
long as she follows the medical construct.
I have also worked with DCF--the law states that they must investigate
every single charge--not becuase it is legitimate, but because it has
been made. I once testified in court on behalf of a mother whose
breastfed baby was removed from her custody simply because the father
made accusations against her. It so happened that the judge hearing the
case was someone I knew and he told me that the judge who had ordered
the emergency removal had no choice given the accusation--its validity
was not relevent. The baby was returned to the mom--the father was
behaving punitively b/c of his anger over their impending divorce.
Frankly, I have seen numerous cases where DCF cases had no validity at
all.
I agree with Nina Berry---mothers do not typically behave in desparate
ways unless they feel powerless. In the US, IMO, the majority of
medical people expect to be obeyed--there is precious little room for
second opinions or the right to to choose our own path to healing. The
system relies upon the power of fear to control and manipulate,
especially when it comes to babies and children. Who truly has the
right to say that a parent is wrong about her own child? We are not
only physical bodies--we are complex beings with social, emotional and
spiritual needs--anyone who has not, to borrow a phrase from Nina,
"checked her brain at the door" knows there is far more to healing than
keeping the body alive.
Jennifer Tow, IBCLC, CT, USA
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