<<I really would prefer not to have babies weighed again until they are 6
weeks old or so.  I would rather that parents and caretakers look at the
baby to
determine if there is a problem.  >>

Unfortunately, many parents are unwilling or unable to see there is a
problem. We had a baby at a meeting Friday, and mothers complained to me
after the meeting. They thought the baby looked "like an alien." The baby
was tiny, no fat deposits, skinny little legs, head was huge in comparison
to the body. She has not seen any health care provider (HCP) in 2 months,
and this baby does not look right.

At the meeting, the mother was confident about the health of her child, but
the rest of us were not. Seeing it was no place for a confrontation, I
decided to call her afterwards. The mother has not answered the phone nor
returned calls, and I am concerned.

I realize we are looking at an older baby in this situation, but the issue
is the same. A person on the outside is concerned, the person on the inside
is not. Who is right? Expressing concern without "taking the baby away" from
the parent. It's a careful balance, because taking the baby away may mean
the parent never really gets the baby back (emotionally).

Looking objectively at the whole picture helps, and it prevents blame from
being placed.  A checklist, or diaper diary, or something that has specific
milestones would be helpful.

Best wishes,
Heather "Sam" Doak

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