Its funny that Charity chose to post about this, as I sat here reading all
the grandmother perspectives wondering if anyone wanted to hear the other
side!

My MIL is a peds and L&D nurse (worthy of IBCLC certification but lacking in
time to do the last steps) in a teeny tiny hospital, she was a childbirth
educator back in the dark ages and tried valiantly to get LLL established in
her small community.  She had converted after her birth experience with my
husband, when she was strapped down against her wishes and my FIL was out of
town for work.  After a horrible bf experience with him (she proudly tells
how her nipple practically fell off it was so wounded) she vowed to learn
more and support mothers better than she had been.

My own mother was an OR nurse and had me at Ruth Lawrence's hospital, and
was told I needed soy ABM because of a fictional medical contraindication.
According to my mother, I was one of the many "babies who got formula and
turned out just fine."

I can vaguely remember a conversation my future husband and I had when we
first met that somehow turned to women's health issues, and his eyes lit up
when I mentioned something about bf and birth practices (how's that for an
interesting dating conversation?!) and he said "oh, you're REALLY going to
like my mom!"

When I was deemed worthy of meeting the IL's I remember women's health came
up again.  We clicked instantly and chatted the night away.  I could tell
that my future husband was relieved and glad to see we hit it off.

Fast forward to my first child's birth, she came to visit when the baby was
2 weeks old, trading off with my mother who had been there the first 2
weeks.  My own mother was all I wanted in those early days, but I remember
being frustrated and scared that she didn't have any idea how to help me
through early poor latch, etc.  The sentence I remember hearing most from
her in those days was "I just want to help, can't I give just one tiny
bottle?"  I remember looking over at her worried face when I repeatedly
latched my ornery baby on and winced.  I could tell she was biting her
tongue for my sake.  When my MIL entered the scene everything changed
(granted it was also 2 weeks later) and suddenly for the first time I was
able to latch my baby on all by myself while she cheered me on and reveled
in memories of nursing all three of her babies.  We spent long days sitting
and rocking and talking about the wonder of new babies.  It was a treat.

Now many years later my MIL still sneaks in little parenting compliments
about bf, cosleeping, being attentive to a baby's needs.  Sometimes those
are the little boosts that make the rest of the bumps in the road not so
steep.

Cheers to all the future and present grandmothers who are bringing back the
idea of being able to rely on the women in your family when you have a baby!

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