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Mon, 3 Mar 2003 21:38:12 -0400 |
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Putting on that annoying editor's hat of mine --
In letter:
had to discuss and debate on (always awkward to avoid ending with a
preposition)
We believe this modified text better reflect*s*
In text:
[world wide] *worldwide* (as later on)
Globalisation is a manifold -- do we mean multi-faceted?
even an elusive concept *,* for there
can have both positive and negative impact*s* on breastfeeding.
world trade organization priorities (upper-case for WTO if we are
talking about *the* WTO)
are no longer accountable to governments, let alone the needs of
mothers and children. (is something accountable *to the needs of*
people?)
[Spreading] *Growing* or *increasing* privatisation of health care ?
[are claiming the product to be closer] *are claiming that the product
is closer *to breastmilk than ever before -- except that the
deregulation and privatisation are not claiming this, the people who are
encouraging deregulation and marketing products are...
are indeed [resorting to]*exploring* *discovering* *creating* new
The rest looks fine to me. The whole thing is exciting and
thought-provoking.
I'm cowering, of course, because there are so many talented writers and
editors on lactnet, and because they have probably already replied ...
Jo-Anne Elder-Gomes
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