My belief that babies need their mothers more than anything (including
> breastmilk) is based in research but in speaking of this my agenda
would be
> perceived as being to keep women out of the workforce and at home. Any

> insights on the agenda/belief of needs of the baby?
>
This is a tough one... As a feminist and stay-at-home mother I deal with
it a lot.

I tell people that if the perception is that my needs are in conflict
with my baby's needs, it is because of an underlying belief system that
supposes conflict is inevitable and reinforces an "us" vs. "them"
mentality (in this case, "me" vs. "it" -- because the baby doesn't have
an identity.) I define that belief system as patriarchal and
anti-feminist. I am more hopeful and more radical than that. I believe
that meeting their baby's needs for growth is a contribution to a
present full of discoveries and personal growth for women, that it frees
them from the enslavement of societal expectations. If appropriate, I
add in comments about corporate interests (for those of Marxist
leanings) and openness and attunement (for those of more New Age
learnings).

Sometimes I just say, "it keeps women from feeling they have to / need
to go into the work force." I am then told that I don't understand the
realities of current economic conditions, and reply that I accept that
other people live in different social spaces and headspaces than I do,
and I am glad people see things differently -- I am easily bored!

Yours,
Jo-Anne

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