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Date: | Mon, 3 Jul 1995 13:40:11 -0600 |
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Your Royal Highness,Queen Martha d'Ohio and
Regent of all 6 & 8 legged creatures
As a music-major and contralto, I find myself in the uncomfortable position
of having to inform your Majesty that you will not ever find a grasshopper
capable of sucking and singing AT THE SAME TIME, due to the fact that:
1) Sucking requires an intake of breath and
2) Singing requires an expulsion of breath
therefore, being mutually *exclusive* processes.
Please forgive me my impertinence, Your Highness, in elucidating upon this
matter of grave importance to Your Esteemed Court, but you have the right
to the correct information as our most Revered and Loved Lady of the Land.
Possible Solution: Have your entourage of trained 'hoppers suck and sing -
ALTERNATELY. It might make quite a pleasant, if not
interesting sound as you strut around your loyal subjects.
Humbly,in Your Service,
Roberta,
the Court Milk-Maid and Self-Proclaimed Choir Director of the LactNetter Chorale
Reheasals will begin upon arrival in Scottsdale, please begin practicing
your buzzes and clicks immediately.Bzzzzzzzzzzzz
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