I do not feel one needs to sacrifice the relationship - just broaden it. Do
you think I am suggesting mum should waste half the day pumping just so dad
can do all the feeds? All that is implied is that it is a [?small] part of
the
bonding experience. I am hardly likely to feel that the only way to bond is
via feeding. In my own case I did one night feed at 0200-0330 depending on
demand for about 2 weeks while my wife got over the birth of our first baby.
I really enjoyed
it, my wife got to sleep. If supporting my wife makes me an ogre then all I
can do is play Shrek!
I would of course also explain possible negatives - but would you also
explain the potential latex nipple problems if a mum is planning an early
return to work? If the child will not feed but just screams then child
minders may 'sack the baby' and demand he be removed. Parents can then find
employment difficulties and economic hardship which can impinge on the whole
family. I am thinking of ways of supporting the family holistically.....
Tony Knox
----- Original Message -----
From: "Teresa Vinisky" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Tuesday, June 26, 2001 3:13 AM
Subject: Dads bonding
> Tony Wrote:
>
> > . I would advocate EBM feeds as
> > being a good way for dads to bond too....
> >
>
> This is such a bad piece of information. I hear this often from people who
> really don't know better, but I would think someone here would actually
have
> better information than this. There are so many other ways for dad to bond
> than to sacrifice a nursing relationship. The first reason this is so bad,
is
> of course, that breastmilk is best right from the source. Other than this,
> saying it gives dad a good way to bond is just silly. Feeding is mom's
job,
> obviously. Dad doesn't lactate.
> When we cover this at meetings we come up with huge lists of things dad
can
> do to bond. On a personal note, neither of my children ever had a single
> bottle. Somehow dad still managed to bond. They drive me crazy sometimes
with
> how close they are to him. I feel like, "What am I? Chopped liver?" Some
of
> the things that always come up are singing to, reading to, bathing,
changing,
> dressing, rocking, massaging, talking to, dancing with, walking with,
> cuddling...
> On the other hand, it was mentioned in the op that if bottles are given
> early, they present no problem (as baby doesn't like ebm if they don't get
a
> rubber nipple early enough). How many of us here have had those calls? My
> ________ told me to give the baby a bottle because _____________- and now
he
> won't nurse?
> It's all too common, and hard to turn back around. That situation is
cheating
> everyone involved. Most of all, the baby!
> Teresa Vinisky
> LLLL in PA
>
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