Jennifer, Bravo for such an articulate, heartfelt, honest commentary. You have summarized the gist of the issue very well, it seems to me. Sometimes we can only see the immediate event, and lose sight of the big picture. I am in total agreement with you on each point. I especially liked the part about how LLL philosophy is really about "normal" childrearing. My favorite book on this topic is Ashley Montague's Touching, The Human Significance of the Skin, which has a wonderful chapter on breastfeeding, and the entire book reinforces BF in numerous comments throughout.
Sincerely,
Patricia Ellis, RN, MA, IBCLC, former LLL leader
----- Original Message -----
From: "Jennifer Tow, IBCLC" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Sunday, July 22, 2001 10:37 AM
Subject: Re: LLL bashing
> Fio wrote:
> << The secretary for the place my husband works had this problem. She
> called the LLL and waited 2 weeks to get a call back...by which time
> she'd weaned her daughter. She had sore nipples and was sure she
> "wasn't making enough milk". :-(>>
>
> The original post was about a nurse who wouldn't refer to LLL and
> specifically steered people away. (Maybe a lawyer can tell me if "tortiary
> interference with trade" applies to a volunteer organization? ) Oddly, some
> of the responses were from people justifying why the nurse might have such an
> opinion, based upon the possibility that she might have had a negative
> experience with a Leader or group. Now, I have known quite a few nurses and
> doctors who have done a horrible job w/ bf'ing moms. I know docs who only
> have office staff return phone calls, so moms never get to ask a direct
> question. It goes on and on. Yet, it never occured to me to tell all moms
> never to ask any doctor or nurse any bf'ing question.
> One of the things that bothers me is the idea that we, as Leaders need to
> spend our time currying the favor of those who deem us fanatical. The
> responses that troubled me the most were those suggesting that somehow the
> Leader needed to "make nice" with the nurse and correct her
> misunderstandings. Hmmm....
> When I first began to put in place a hospital-based LLL Peer Counseling
> Program almost 9 years ago, I was asked by a wonderful ped not to use the LLL
> name, b/c LLL was so disliked in the hospital. I refused and she supported me
> anyway. (She also admitted that there was little validity to the attitude,
> although there were certain instances where I could see why a certain HCP in
> a certain situation would be upset with a certainl Leader). Believe me, the
> attitude was fierce and hard to take a lot of the time. But, I never made
> apologies for LLL to anyone and never acted as if I had to get them to like
> LLL. We just did a really good job and most of the nurses and ped's (OB was
> truly another story) loved our program and our staff. So did the moms. After
> 5 years (the first planning stage only), there were still some nurses who had
> their attitude about LLL. The attitude had been based upon myth or their own
> bf experiences (or lack-thereof) when I began the program and it was based
> upon a desire to hold onto their beliefs when I left.
> I do think dialogue is critical, but I do not believe Leaders need to
> behave as if we are the out of line children who need to regain the approval
> of the grown up HCP's. Others cannot hold opinions of us that we do not
> ultimately hold of ourselves. I truly do not see LLL as radical and I think
> that one of the reasons we are seen that way is that we take a little pride
> (as an organization) in that label and hold onto it ourselves. It isn't
> radical or fanatical to breastfeed babies or children or co-sleep or attach
> to our childen!!! It's normal. Just plain normal.
> Part of the problem for LLL, I think, is that when bf'ing wasn't very
> important in our society, we were truly still the experts. Now that bf'ing
> (actually, it really is only breastmilk so far) is important, lots of people
> want to be the expert. And the level of what is required to be the expert has
> changed, as well. I personally think the role of Leaders is shifting and I
> think that will be a good thing. In the end, no matter how much information
> and even loving support a professional can provide, mother-to-mother support
> can never be replaced.
> Foi also wrote:
> <<Now that she knows my husband, and has met me, she knows she could call
> me if she needed help (on a subsequent baby), though I don't know if she
> WOULD if push came to shove...but it's too late to even suggest that
> now, as her daughter is 16 months like mine, and hasn't nursed since she
> was about 6 weeks old. >>
>
> Many times I have met moms who say they tried to get help with bf'ing, but
> gave up due to misinformation, not getting a return call, whatever... and
> then after talking with me, decided that "if only they had known me then,
> they would have been successful". This is a very seductive idea for those of
> us who would have been the saviour. It is certainly true that bad information
> can so destroy a mother's efforts that she will not bf. Or that she will get
> bad information from someone she believes "ought to know what she is talking
> about" and so believe that she really couldn't bf, even with help. There are
> LLL Leaders who are not competant to help mothers. There are LC's and doctors
> and nurses and RD's and nutritionists who aren't competent to help mothers.
> And, yet, they all put in their opinions (often as fact) and make the world
> of lactation difficult for everyone. It is not terribly likely, as lovely as
> it sounds, that a whole slew of moms would have bf if only they had known me,
> or you or anyone else in particular. My own SIL knew me very well and managed
> to only bf for a few weeks. Frankly, I don't think mothers should have to be
> highly motivated to bf successfully--we should be working on establishing a
> bf culture in which any woman can help any other woman bf. But until then,
> sometimes there is high success in spite of low motivation and low success in
> spite of high motivation. But most of the time, when there is high
> motivation, there is high success and when there is low motivation, there is
> low success.
> Jennifer Tow, IBCLC, CT, USA
>
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