Barbara wrote,

> She has been very hesitant to actually put the babies to breast but
> finally
> today mentioned that she went into the tub with them over the weekend and
> didn't have a good experience with getting either one to latch on
>
One of the reasons a mother of multiples might hesitate to put the
babies to breast is that having more than one is hard to manage in the
early days. I would compare it to a father's reaction to his fragile
newborn... mothers of multiples take longer to feel comfortable handling
two or three babies. I'm amazed she considered taking a bath with the
babies. It was months before I would consider getting in the tub,
because I was afraid of what would happen to the baby outside the tub or
whatever. Help and support -- another pair of hands -- is helpful. I
think for her to establish a time frame according to her comfort level
is reasonable. Saying "tomorrow I will try to breastfeed them together
when my mother-in-law is visiting" or "next week I'm going to skip one
of the night bottles" or "When baby a weighs x pounds I'll cut down the
supplement to..." can be very useful. I know, intellectually, that we
shouldn't try to control things or babies, but giving ourselves concrete
goals can help us to feel like we can "manage" to get through the day.
It is a counselling trick, as well, to set realistic goals, even if they
seem to be pretty low expectations to other people. Counsellors dealing
with ppd moms sometimes suggest writing up "to do" lists of things like
brushing teeth, cooking a hot meal, etc. and checking them off. With my
multiples, I was limited to one household task per day, i.e. putting the
clothes in the washer or chopping vegetables, for a few weeks. And
please, direct her to LLL: phone support can be a major benefit when you
can't move from your nursing chair.
Hope this helps.
Jo-Anne

             ***********************************************
The LACTNET mailing list is powered by L-Soft's renowned
LISTSERV(R) list management software together with L-Soft's LSMTP(TM)
mailer for lightning fast mail delivery. For more information, go to:
http://www.lsoft.com/LISTSERV-powered.html

             ***********************************************
The LACTNET mailing list is powered by L-Soft's renowned
LISTSERV(R) list management software together with L-Soft's LSMTP(TM)
mailer for lightning fast mail delivery. For more information, go to:
http://www.lsoft.com/LISTSERV-powered.html