> Date: Fri, 13 May 2005 06:23:54 -0400
> From: Lisa Boisvert Mackenzie <[log in to unmask]>
> Subject: nursing and trauma ~ grief
>
> I am feeling lost is providing a response to this query (apart from my
> strong feelings!) So to you, wise ones"
>
> Nursing mom is a childcare provider to toddlers. She was told by the
> counselor to one of the children's siblings that breastfeeding in front of
> the children is traumatizing them and causing them grief because they are
> young and experiencing their first separation from their mothers. One of
> the children has recently begun nursing (because of her experince of
> watching the care giver nurse) and the others have varied histories of being
> nursed, (some have either asked to nurse again or are nursing their dolls)
> some quite briefly, all with some breast time. One child is adopted from
> abroad and spent a year in an orphanage and does have attachment issues
> which the family is actively addressing. I have never looked at this from
> such a perspective. Any ideas?
>
> Warmly,
>
> Lisa Boisvert-Mackenzie
What about talking with these children about their feelings about nursing,
and reading some books with them. They can be encouraged to nurse their
dolls and to talk about how they remember nursing or watch their younger
siblings nursing.
Here are some good books to recommend for the day care to have on hand:
Good Books for Nursing Toddlers
We Like to Nurse by Chia Martin. Illustrated by Shukyo Lin Rainey. Hohm
Press, 1995. Paperbound
Fourteen animal pairs are shown nursing in bright, flat pictures with simple
text, ending with a human mother and baby. A favorite of breastfed
toddlers. (ages 1 - 3)
One LC I know created a wonderful puzzle by cutting the pictures in this
book into simple puzzle pieces and gluing them onto a wood base. Each
mother-baby pair in the illustrations became a separate 2 piece puzzle. In
dooing the puzzle, you have to latch each mother to its own baby - the lamb
with the sheep, the human mother with the human baby, etc. Then you can go
on to talk about how mother's milk is species specific. I wish the creators
of this book would market this as a puzzle.
Breastmilk makes my tummy yummy by Cecilia Moen. Midsummer Press, Sweden
1999. This book is ideal for a nursing toddler. Simple, rhymed verse
accompanies the multicultural illustrations of babies and toddlers nursing
in various situations: when angry or sad, in the bath tub, when mummy is on
the phone, in a family bed, etc. Tandem nursing is also shown: "Two can
breastfeed without fuss, there is room for both of us." (ages 2 4)
Maggie's Weaning by Mary Joan Deutschbein. Moon Gold Press, 1993.
Reissued in smaller format by La Leche League International, 1999.
Preschooler Maggie shares the story of her gradual and gentle weaning
process. A helpful note to parents begins the book. Nice for home use.
(Ages 2 5)
Good Books for the Sibling of a Breastfed Baby
My New Baby by Annie Kubler. Childıs Play (International) Ltd., 2000. This
14 page, wordless board book shows a toddler helping his family to care for
the new baby. Two breastfeeding pictures. (ages 1 2)
We Have a Baby by Cathryn Falwell. Clarion Books, 1993. This is a picture
book for the very young child with a new sibling. Just 32 pages long, with
only a few words on each page, the book shows a loving family with both
parents actively involved in the care of the toddler and the new baby. The
mother is shown nursing the baby, her arm around the toddler who is nestled
against her and eating milk and a cookie. (ages 1 - 3)
Mama, Daddy, Baby and Me by Lisa Gewing. Illustrated by Donna Larimer.
Spirit Press, 1989. The very simple, rhymed text and appealing
illustrations show a family welcoming a new baby, told from the toddler
sibling's point of view. One picture of the mother and baby nursing. (ages
2 4
Hello Baby! By Lizzy Rockwell. Crown Publishers, 1999. A young boy
describes his mother's pregnancy, his sister's hospital birth, homecoming
and first day at home. One nice breastfeeding illustration. (ages 3 - 6)
What Baby Needs by William Sears MD, Martha Sears RN, and Christie Watts
Kelly. Little Brown & Company, 2001. The needs of a new baby are described
in terms a preschooler can understand and relate to. The baby is carried in
a sling and sleeps in the parentsı room. The father is very involved in
this babyıs care. Feelings of the older siblings are recognized as the
book models many positive ways for children to interact with a new baby.
Includes two nice breastfeeding pictures and one of bottle feeding motherıs
milk.
A companion book about pregnancy, Baby on the Way, explains the emotional
and physical changes that occur when a mother is expecting a new baby.
Includes a nice breastfeeding illustration. (ages 3 6)
Will There Be a Lap for Me? by Dorothy Corey. Illustrated by Nancy
Poydar. Albert Whitman & Company, 1992. Preschooler Kyle, from a middle
class African-American family, misses his special place on his mother's lap
as her pregnancy advances and the new baby arrives. A full page
illustration shows Mother nursing the new baby with Kyle beside her on the
sofa. Kyle is sad that the baby needs to eat so often, but Mother makes
room on her lap and special time in her day for him again. (ages 3 - 8)
How You Were Born by Joanna Cole. Photographs by Margaret Miller. Morrow
Junior Books, 1993. A clear and helpful book about conception, fetal
development and birth is illustrated with color photographs of parents and
children from many racial backgrounds. The 1984 edition with same text and
black and white photos by Hella Hammid and others is also still available in
paperback and has a lovely breastfeeding illustration. (ages 3 - 11)
How Was I Born? by Lennart Nilsson and Lena Katarina Swanberg.
Illustrated with color photographs by Lennart Nilsson. Delacorte Press,
1994. A Swedish preschooler tells the story of her baby brother's birth.
Three lovely photographs show the new baby nursing just after birth.
Additional text explains conception, birth and the growth and development of
babies. 80 pages long. (ages 4 - 8)
Good Stories That Happen to Include Breastfeeding
The World Is Full of Babies! by Mick Manning and Brita Granström.
Delacorte Press, 1996. With humorous, engaging text and bright, attractive
illustrations, the authors explain how human and animal babies grow and
develop. An East Asian mother is shown nursing her baby. (ages 2 - 6)
Supermom by Mick Manning. Illustrated by Brita Granström. Albert Whitman &
Company, 2001. A wide variety of human and animal mothers feed, shelter,
talk, play with, protect, cuddle and nurse their babies to sleep. (ages 3
6)
Look What I See! Where can I Be? In the Neighborhood by Dia L. Michels.
Photographs by Michael J. N. Bowles.
Platypus Media, LLC, 2001. Clues help children to guess where the baby
wakes up as a busy family explores a multicultural urban neighborhood. The
baby is carried in a sling, a front pack, a back pack, a stroller, and a
wagon. The last picture shows the mother and baby nursing outdoors on the
grounds of the U.S. Capitol. (ages 2 4)
Happy Birth Day! by Robie H. Harris. Illustrated by Michael Emberley.
Candlewick Press, 1996. A mother tells her child about her hospital birth
and first day of life. Large, beautiful illustrations capture the essence
of a newborn baby breastfeeding and falling asleep cuddled up with both
parents. (ages 3 - 8)
Only the Cat Saw by Ashley Wolff. Originally published in 1982. Walker
and Company, 1996 (softcover). In this colorful picture book the cat sees
all the details in a typical 24 hour day in the life of a busy farm family.
The mother is shown breastfeeding the baby in a rocking chair at dawn.
(ages 3 - 8)
The Best Gifts by Marsha Forchuk Skrypuch. Illustrated by Halina Below.
Fitzhenry & Whiteside, 1998. Growing up from infancy to adulthood, Sara
receives the most important gifts from her parents (including breastfeeding,
time, love and caring) and passes them on to her own baby son. (ages 4
8)
Over the Green Hills by Rachel Isadora. Greenwillow, 1992. A young boy
in the Transkei, on the east coast of South Africa, accompanies his mother
on a long walk to visit Grandma Zindzi in another village. Baby sister
Noma is carried wrapped close on her mother's back. They make several
nursing stops, and this older baby is shown breastfeeding in one picture.
(ages 4 - 8)
Breasts by Genichiro Yagyu. First published in Japan in 1989. Kane/Miller
Book Publishers, 1999. Alternately silly and tender, this book introduces
young children to the real purpose of women's breasts: feeding babies.
(ages 5 - 8)
Also, if you go to this web address, you will find some guidelines developed
by the Wisconsin Breastfeeding Coalition for helping child care centers be
supportive of breastfeeding:
http://dhfs.wisconsin.gov/health/Nutrition/Breastfeeding/bffriendlycomm.htm
Scroll down to child care.
Anne Altshuler,RN, MS, IBCLCC and LLL leader in Madison, WI
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