Hi All,
While this is not exactly BF related this is a sad situation that I watched
this morning.
I watch Good Morning America most mornings.  This mmorning they had a
psychologist on who was talking about discipline and children  She said that
children start as young as 3 months in manipulating parents to get what they
want.  She used as an example the 3-4 mo old crying in their crib.  She said
that if you take that crying baby into your bed to calm them down, the next
thing you know it's been 5 yrs and you have a 5 yr old in your bed and you
won't be able to get them out.  She talked about developmental stages and
how kids go through them.  Well, I have a degree in child development and
she was really missing the boat here.  At this early age children are in the
stage of trust-vs-mistrust.  If you leave your infant in the crib to "work
it out and learn to self calm" as this person says you should, then you have
totally screwed up this childs sense of trust in his parents to be there
when he needs them.  Next she talked about older children and if they
misbehave you tell them that if they don't stop the bad behavior you will
give away a favorite toy/item of theirs, and then to follow through, if the
child does not stop the bad behavior you take said favorite belonging put it
in the car with the child, go to salvation army/goodwill and make the child
watch as you give the toy away.  I was absolutely astonished!  How cruel can
one be to their kids?  In my opinion this type of treatment is emotionally
abusive and can lead to hatred of the parent.  Of course, she says that by
doing these things you will end up with a kid who is Not a juvinile
delinquent.  But, IMNSHO, you will end up with a kid who has no respect for
his/her parents and who will have a hard time with others in later life.
We need to get Dr Sears on one of these TV shows to talk about attachment
parenting and discipline that does not injure the psyche of the child or the
parent/child relationship.  (My own mother did to me what this person was
talking about, and I can assure you it DID seriously hurt our relationship.)
Jay
always amazed and saddened by the stupidity of the so-called "experts".
Jay Simpson, CLE
Sacramento, CA
"No Miracles performed here, just a lot of love and hard work."
ICQ#4681696