Nathalie,
This baby sure sounds like failure to thrive (FTT)!  Whether this is
related to mom not holding baby or whether she doesn't hold is
because baby doesn't respond to holding is another question.  (This
was a big complaint for many years from mothers of autistic
children.  They were blamed for the condition because they weren't
interacting with their babies, but eventually the "experts"
acknowledged that this behavior on the part of the moms was a
RESPONSE, not a CAUSE.  These infants exhibited signs of discomfort
and stress when moms cuddled and interacted, so naturally the moms
did less of that.)  Is the smaller head a cause of the problems or
an effect.  I lean toward thinking it is another symptom of whatever
the underlying cause is since it showed up early on.
It's hard to believe the professionals she has seen have "blown off"
the concerns.  Are they unconcerned because they feel mom is an
overprotective mom, a worry wort, or is there something she'd not
telling either you or them?  Many times mom's concerns are
disregarded, but when mom persists, eventually she is proven right.
Is there anyplace where she can have a multidisciplinary evaluation/
conference about this infant?  In the US there are early
intervention programs where such evaluations are routine.  I note
you are from Chili (if I read your signature correctly) so son't
know if you have anything similar.
I would encourage thjis mom to try to find some way to have further
evaluation of thie infant.  In the meantime, are there ways you can
"model" more interaction with this baby?  Perhaps ask if you can
hold him to evaluate some aspect of your dealings with them and
meanwhile, talk to baby, cuddle baby, etc.

Good luck, and please let us know the outcome.

Winnie

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