Cathy Bargar wrote:

> Re: the comment "I just don't think she cared enough to keep it up.", and
> the recent thread about how the "stuff" intereferes with breastfeeding.
>
> Well, WE (all of us "Wise Ones" here on lactnet) all recognize the truth of
> eveything that has been said on the topic here. But it bothers me a lot when
> we take on the tone of "blaming" the mothers, or attributing the rampant
> consumerism and its negative effect on BFing to mothers not caring enough,
> or not being loving enough, or maybe even not being smart enough to get what
> is obvious to us. We do families a grave disservice when we let ourselves
> speak like that. I don't think that we'll ever get anywhere by blaming
> parents for not always or immediately seeing what is so very clear to us.

Hi Cathy,

I appreciate what you say about new parents being new and just trying to find
their way.  I think this is very often true.  However, I also know that all too
often it's also true some mothers really DON'T care that much.  The post that
you quote above is mine.  My comment about her not caring enough came from
personal experience with this woman.  She was not someone who I was simply
treating on a house call, but someone I knew well.

As much as it sounds nice to say that we must always give mothers the benefit of
the doubt, the fact is that all mothers are not always concerned with what is
best.  Rather, they are simply worried about what is the least they can get away
with doing while keeping out of trouble with SS and their own conscience.
Unfortunately, what the latter requires is too often very little.

Tammy Schilling
LLL of Salisbury
--
personal copy designs
better living through computer graphics
http://www.personal-copy.com
410 219 5300

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