HI All,
Having some very personal experience with this type of problem may I suggest
a ffew things?
1) Stop putting this baby to breast for a while and let these nipples heal!
 Now I don't mean heal a little bit, I mean ALL THE WAY.  (emphasis)
  Why?  This mom needs a break, and so do the nipples.
2)  Baby has a high palate:  It is possible that baby is stuffing moms
nipples into the palate and therefore mangling them each and every time he
BFs.  Even without the sensitive gag reflex, this is possible.  My suggestion
here would be suck training (have baby suck on mom or dads finger with finger
at the soft/hard palate juncture where nipple should be to make sure that
baby is used to something being there) combined with the finger feeding
either with syringe (which can be a real pain) or by SNS (which can also be
frustrating).  Or get a Medela nipple and turn it upside down and use that,
with suck training used whenever baby wants to suck on something, or whenever
baby Will suck on finger.
3) If bottle feeding, bottle feed at breast.  Babys cheek should be against
moms bare breast and bottle laid against moms chest, baby held in BF
position.  Switch sides!
4)  Stop with all the topicals and let nipps heal on their own.  If it isn't
thrush, and they aren't infected, leave them alone.  Let moms milk do any
healing treatment.  Nips should be exposed to air as much as possible (if she
can wander around without a shirt or bra on all day, so much the better!)
 Get some sunshine on the nips if possible, a few minute here and there.
5)  Watch for mastitis!!!  Especially bi-lateral. Pumping (if mom decides to
go for a healing break) should be regular and on a tight schedule to keep up
her supply and help avoid mastitis.
6)  Thanks goodness she has support.  If it hadn't been for my hubby and MIL,
I don't know if I would have made it to be still BF the kid who tore me to
shreds and left scars where nipples should be.
7) Ask mom what she wants to do.  She may be dying to take a break from BF
from the source, but is afraid to ask if she "can".

Good luck!
Jay
Ouch...the memories....