To all, Not be beat a dead horse, but I guess I will anyways. I guess the phrase about "not enabling bad choices" gave me something to think about. My question would be, who decides that it is a bad choice and what is the criteria? Some of this really goes to the heart of what we spend a lot of time doing. as LCs or LLLLs. Many new or aspiring LCs are worried about amasssing a solid base of knowledge about breastfeeding. But they also need to fugure out how they are going to impart that information to the women they are trying to help and use it to help these women make very important decisions in their lives at a time when they are very vulnerable and unsure of themselves. When I teach my prenatal breastfeeding class, I spend a lot of time, in different ways, trying to get them to think about priorities and the choices out there and the consequences choices can have. As far as comparing breastmilk and formula, I don't really pull any punches and I don't worry about making someone feel "guilty" about their decisions.. About things like co-sleeping, nursing older children, etc., I let people know that it is an time-honored method of child-rearing that has research to back up its safety/advantages so that if they go in that direction they know they are doing something very normal and healthy. When it comes to working with a mom who is searching for solutions to the problems she is having with breastfeeding, I continue to give valid information. But I usually offer several choices to her as to how she might want to proceed, outlining what I feel are the pros and cons of each plan and the possible consequences. At that point, it is up to her to make a choice as to what is best for her and her baby and it is my responsibility, I feel, to support her decision as best I can. Now in my heart, I have an opinion as to what I think the best plan would be which would be most likely to ensure that breastfeeding will continue. And maybe some of you think that that is the only plan that should be offered. But the funny thing is, that over the years I have been surprised to find out that the plan I liked the least sometimes turned out to be the most successful for that mother/baby dyad. Sometimes new research shows that my choice really wasn't the best after all. Even in some cases where the mom chose to go with formula with one child, the next time around she kept on with breastfeeding and was comfortable going to me for help because I had respected her decisions the first time around. It is not easy sometimes. And I am most aggressive about putting forth some really strong points when I feel that a mother is opting out due to "frivolous" reasons, a judgement call on my part, I'll admit. But my job is to help a mom make a fully informed choice - bad or good? - only time will tell. Which is why we should never feel badly about the choices that moms make - we don't really know for sure what the result will be down the road. This would definitely be a great topic to kick around at a conference - there is not a lot of right or wrong here, but many grey areas that even us old-timers continue to struggle with. And now I need to acknowledge some well deserved guilt for using the computer as an excuse for not sitting down and doing taxes while I am at home recuperating. Hopefully, you will not see my name on any more posts for the next few days. Warmly, Sharon Knorr, BSMT, LLLL, IBCLC in Newark, New York (near Rochester) mailto:[log in to unmask] ___________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com/getjuno.html or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]