Dear Debbie, These situations used to haunt me. I just hated it when a mother would call me and tell me she was quitting, or worse, I would have to call her as a follow-up because she couldn't face me with her decision. Probably one of the best things that I ever learned from La Leche League was about listening and acceptance. I learned to solve breastfeeding problems much sooner than I learned to listen. When a mother drops this bombshell on me, I take one of a few different tacks. I may say to her, "you sound overwhelmed right now", or "you must be feeling very disappointed", or "what a hard decision that must have been to make", or "tell me what happened", etc. I do my very best *not* to argue with her decision. Often, I hear a change in their voice as they respond with their story, and I try to empathize with what they are feeling, validate their struggle. Sometimes, as the mom feels heard, she opens up to other possibilities, and I am able to share the information that will help her keep breastfeeding. Other times, she doesn't want to be persuaded, and I use the opportunity, if it is appropriate, to tell her that she has learned much information that she can apply with the next baby to help breastfeeding go better. I have had second time around mothers return to me (I just had one call last night) because I left the door open for them. It takes everything in me sometimes to bite my tongue, not chastise them, but let them be. And it is worth it. Do I blow it sometimes? Of course! But this is one skill that I am working very hard on, for it is the one that brings in the new moms almost more than my technical problem-solving skills. Hope this helps. Been there-------Lisa ****************************************************************************** Lisa A. Marasco, IBCLC / [log in to unmask] International Board Certified Lactation Consultant / [log in to unmask] ******************************************************************************