I just checked the National Sexual Assault Hotline and their statistics indicate that 1 in 6 women have been sexually assaulted. I am curious about the scope of this problem. Could the people that have identified this as a problem please tell us the number of hospital assaulted women you see in a year and the total number of clients you see in a year? Rachel Wahl RN IBCLC >Date: Sat, 29 Jul 2006 22:17:01 EDT >From: Pamela Mazzella Di Bosco <[log in to unmask]> >Subject: using the word rape > >Rape is a strong word. It is an act of violence. It is criminal offense. >It is most often against women. The feelings are deep, lifelong and >painful. >Years later you can talk about the experience and feel the same emotions, >the fear, the helplessness. > >Okay, now find me another word that is exactly as strong to call what is >happening to women in birth and breastfeeding 'help' in hospitals and I >will use >it. I could use a word to offer them so they can put a name to it. When I >am >talking to women, they are crying and the words they use are fear, pain, >helplessness, overpowered, defeated, degraded. Some of these women have >been >raped, they recognize the feelings well. I think we do need to pay >attention >to what is happening to women today because it is hurting them and hurting >their babies. We need to remember our statistics about women and abuse >and >assume the women we are working with have likely suffered some form of >abuse and >proceed with utmost respect and gentleness. The sad thing, many women >just >assume this type of treatment was necessary, and to add to their other >feelings they also feel guilt for feeling the way they do about something >that just >had to be done to them....it was for their own good, for their babies own >good, and they should not be so upset about it. How wrong is that for a >woman...to feel so wrong at a time in her life when she should feel so >wonderful? > >I understand we want to reserve certain words for what they are meant for. >But inappropriate touch is not a strong enough expression of what happens >and >it certainly does not meet the emotions it brings up in the women who >experience it. The original post said the 'mother' used this word to >express what >it felt like. She is not the first. I have had mothers use that word to >describe how they felt, I have used it when I hear the story shared and >the >mother acts like it was all her fault....and she should have done more to >stop >it, and if only she wasn't doing 'fill in the blank'....so much like a >rape >victim blaming herself for the violence against her. Maybe the mom didn't >use a >word we like, but it was her word, her feelings, and what we should be >talking about is not how wrong that word is, but how horrible that it is >how a new >mother felt when being helped to feed her baby. > >Take care, >Pam MazzellaDiBosco, IBCLC, RLC >Florida > > > *********************************************** > *********************************************** To temporarily stop your subscription: set lactnet nomail To start it again: set lactnet mail (or digest) To unsubscribe: unsubscribe lactnet All commands go to [log in to unmask] The LACTNET mailing list is powered by L-Soft's renowned LISTSERV(R) list management software together with L-Soft's LSMTP(R) mailer for lightning fast mail delivery. For more information, go to: http://www.lsoft.com/LISTSERV-powered.html