Thanks, Eithne, very interesting.

Feeling psychologically safe is as essential as feeling physically 
safe. As humans, we have a natural tendency to turn away from or 
reject  experiences which leave us feeling psychologically unsafe.

Mothers breastfeeding in a formula feeding culture need to feel 
psychologically safe - they need to feel that although they cannot 
measure the amount of milk their baby is getting, it is  safe to 
breastfeed. They need to feel that although no one else can feed 
their baby, it is  safe to breastfeed. They need to feel that 
although they are using their fallible and untrustworthy body to make 
milk, it is safe to breastfeed.

***And to spell it out  from the opposite way*** - if a mother 
formula feeds, either from the beginning or later, and she feels 
judged, criticised, marginalised, she will feel psychologically 
*unsafe*....and that is bad for her mental well-being, and bad for 
breastfeeding advocacy.

I really don't care any longer that people protest at this, saying 
'but I don't make women feel that way - all I do is give them 
information'. I no longer care about Eleanor Roosevelt saying 'No one 
can make you feel inferior without your consent' - women may not 
actually feel inferior if they FF, but they believe we think they 
*should* feel inferior!

I have heard all the arguments.  They might have worked with me 
before the internet, and before I saw the damage being done to 
breastfeeding by women's hurt and anger....travelling round the world 
seventeen times before breakfast, sometimes several times a week, and 
fuelling formula industry marketing.  Listen to Adele (presumably as 
famous outside the UK as inside)
http://www.salon.com/2016/03/28/listen_to_adele_jamie_oliver_guilt_trips_over_how_easy_breastfeeding_is_just_pile_pressure_on_vulnerable_moms/ 
- she tells us all to 'go f*** ourselves' from the stage, and she 
means *us*, with what she sees as pressure to breastfeed (she had a 
struggle for nine weeks) and she actually name checks a formula brand 
(no, she won't have been paid to do this - it will be the brand she 
used, marketed to UK women as the brand you use when breastfeeding 
doesn't work for you).

Something needs to change in our dialogue with mothers -  we're 
getting it badly wrong, even when we think we're the ones getting it 
right.

Heather Welford Neil, UK





>This response may be at a slight tangent to the topic, but it is 
>germane to breastfeeding advocacy. (Have I used the word 'germane' 
>correctly? ;-) ). Last year as part of a >masters programme I did an 
>assignment on change management, and I found it riveting, and 
>particularly suited to bf advocacy. One author (Schein?) contended 
>that for >change to take place, first of all the need for change 
>needed to be identified; secondly, and this is the bit I think 
>highly relevant to this discourse, psychological safety needed >to 
>be assured.
>When we change we lose something; we lose the old ways. Learning the 
>new ways can seem daunting and it may feel safer to continue with 
>the old habits. Judgement of >choices interferes with psychological 
>safety, so if the change manager appears to be unempathetic, or 
>disrespectful of one's hankering for the older, known ways, 
>then >psychological safety will not occur, and change will not be 
>effected. In simpler terms, to convince those who are reluctant, the 
>change manager needs to repect their point of >view.

>Does that make any kind of sense?

>Eithne Murray, Ireland

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