> For some
>reason many in the lactation world has this idea that bottlefeeding is some
>cold, uncaring, unfeeling, unemotional task. I snort loudly at this
>assertion. Not all bottlefeeders just pop it in like it's a plug and
>remove when empty ignoring baby and baby cues. To assume all are like this
>is a grave disservice to those who do feed their babies tenderly, with
>love, with a bottle.
It is certainly true that bottle-feeding can be done with love and cuddles.
I certainly bottle-fed Peter that way (at least most of the time) and I
have the most amazing letter someone in my survey sent me about lovingly
bottle-feeding an adopted child. It is also true that breastfeeding can be
done perfunctorily, without a lot of interaction -- I certainly didn't pay
a whole lot of attention to Alexander as he nursed while I wrote my first
book. Of course, that wasn't for *every* breastfeeding. And I certainly
read my share of magazines, watched TV, heck I even taught tutorials and
went grocery shopping and attended faculty meetings while Alexander nursed
happily away with very little social interaction or eye contact or talking
on my part! But even if mom is *asleep* while baby breastfeeds, there is
still a lot of skin-to-skin, warmth, sounds, smells, and other interactions
going on.
At the same time, I spent many hours waiting in pediatric waiting rooms
with Peter while he got twice-weekly allergy shots (1988-95) -- you had to
first wait your turn, then get your shot, then sit and wait for 20 minutes
to make sure you didn't have a bad reaction to the shot. So I had the
opportunity to watch many mothers with either "healthy" babies coming in
for two-week checkups or 2-4-6 months' immunizations, or "sick" babies
waiting to see the pediatrician -- and the VAST VAST majority of them were
completely ignored by their mothers, whether they were bottle-feeding
during the wait or not, and regardless of their age. Most often, the baby
was in a bucket carrier, placed on the floor at the mother's feet, and if
the baby squawked the mother might jiggle the bucket with her foot. If the
baby needed to be fed, the bottles were mostly propped, even for 2 week
olds. In other cases, the mother would reach down and hold the bottle with
her hand, but it was a "dis-embodied" bottle, not connected to a person or
a face, as far as the baby was concerned. Now perhaps this was "public"
behavior, and mothers paid more attention to their babies when they were at
home with them. Let's hope so.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Katherine A. Dettwyler, Ph.D. email:
[log in to unmask]
Anthropology Department phone: (409) 845-5256
Texas A&M University fax: (409) 845-4070
College Station, TX 77843-4352
http://www.prairienet.org/laleche/dettwyler.html
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