This is a good topic, Diane!
I think that the word 'unsuccessful' doesn't automatically suggest fault,
whereas 'failed' does, at least imo. To me 'failed' suggests that one
didn't do something right, suggests responsibility. 'Unsuccessful' to me
suggests simply what it says -- that someone was not successful at whatever
they tried.
From personal experience, I was unsuccessful breastfeeding my first 2
children, but successful with the second two. The healthcare system
'failed' me, so I was unsuccessful. My story was a variation on the one Pam
told, except I was told from the birth that I would need to supplement and
that I would never make enough milk since my breasts weren't large (20 years
ago). And like the lady in Pam's story I was never told about pumping and
by 6 weeks I'd given up. It wasn't until the 2nd baby was 6 weeks old and I
was on the point of quitting again that I heard about LLL and while that
didn't help that baby, since I knew the truth then, with my next two
children I had success.
Succeed is a good word, I believe. We even tell our children, "If at first
you don't succeed, try, try again" to try and instill perseverence.
Sometimes we don't succeed :-)
Regards,
Cindi Swisher
> I honestly don't know what to think, not having "failed" myself.
> But I want
> to get it right, and at the same time I don't want to get in an
> unnecessary
> obfuscation. These are women who tried and... weren't successful. Are
> "unsuccessful" and "failed" synonyms or are there subtle
> differences that we
> need to be alert to? Does avoiding the word increase or decrease the
> presumed stigma? Do we *need* the term "failed" so that the healthcare
> system can be really clear about what happened? (They didn't choose
> formula-feeding, they were forced into it.) Or do we *need* to avoid it?
>
> Are there those among us who've been on both sides of the fence? What
> term(s) are you comfortable with and why?
> --
> Diane Wiessinger, MS, IBCLC Ithaca, NY
> www.wiessinger.baka.com
>
> ***********************************************
>
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