Noelle - poor you, having these difficult conditions to work with
in addition to difficult mom!
I agree with you and would definitely stay out of exploring her
sexual feelings. She seems to have a body-image problem that
probably needs quite a bit of expert therapy - which is not our
field.
Although your ideas has merit in very many BF situations, in THIS
special case with the added problem of isolation and lack of LC
support, my instinct is to go in the opposite direction, in other
words, to *desexualize* BF. Somehow, in her mind, breasts are
only associated with the sexual act, and not in their proper
physiologic role of nurturing young. I would try to redirect the
act of BF into the proper role. Therefore, NO skin-to-skin. IMO,
this would be too much for her, like trying to combine therapy
with bf counselling. Maybe have mom either drink or eat something
together with junior, making it a sitting-down-to-lunch together
ambience. Focus on BF as feeding (even though we know that it's
much more) instead of a sexual fling. NO nursing in public - she
isn't equipped for this psychologically. And, as much as it hurts
to say this, until she's got a grip on this (and she may never
ever get to it), no nursing in bed (she probably associates the
bed with sex).
It may be helpful to recommend a good BF book with lots of
pictures, since you said she didn't seem to like being touched.
Good luck! One last word. Please bear in mind that I have not
seen this mom or talked with her. If my ideas seem to have merit,
try them, but I would certainly acknowledge your on-the-spot
being closer than mine! Judy Knopf in Beer Sheva, Israel