In a message dated 96-01-12 17:46:32 EST, Kjetil writes:

>
>I think it is a legitimate wish for the adultd to keep their bed for
>themselves at night after a while.  I will say (or think) that a
>mother is a "bad breastfeeder" if she do not share her bed with the
>baby when it is 6-7 or 12-13 months.
>
>
Pardon me,
But are really saying that a mom who doesn't share her bed with her baby in
order to breastfeed is a bad breastfeeder?  I don't understand this.  Quite
frankly, it is impossible for me to breastfeed my child in bed.  Lying down
to breastfeed kills my lower back, and has done so since my son was born.
 Sitting up in bed is just as bad because I still have no back support.  I do
not sleep with my baby because he tosses and turns all night long and makes
it very difficult  for my husband and I to sleep.(right now, baby has his
first cold, he's 16 mo old, and the only way he will sleep is with us.  It is
really difficult because I don't sleep well and don't get proper rest and as
a result I am now sick and tired to boot!  It is a frustrating situation, but
since he needs to sleep with us right now, he can.  But I am really looking
forward to when he goes back to his crib!  I am not a very nice person when I
am overtired and sick at the same time! )  Instead, baby sleeps in a crib
about 2 feet from the end of our bed, and when he wakes up (and we most times
wake together our senses are so tied each other) dad gets him out of the
crib, I go potty, and dad gives baby to me out in the livingroom in my nice
comfy rocker.  I do not consider myself a "bad breastfeeder".  In fact I
consider myself a great breastfeeder with this arrangement.  Many of my
friend have their babies in a seperate room and the babies sleep through the
night (prob'ly because they gave up crying cause they weren't heard) or they
scream for several minutes before mom or dad wakes up.
Maybe you might consider rethinking your belief, if in fact I read what you
said correctly, and realize that not everyone can sleep with their baby, and
just because they can't doesn't make them a bad breastfeeder.  Knowing that
they can't sleep with their child and breastfeed in bed may actually make
them better because they know their limitations and don't push themselves to
do something that would be unhealthy for all.
Sure I want my bed to myself, but I would love to sleep with my child.  I
slept with my oldest son for 5 years before my hubby and I got together, and
I loved it!    At that time my son decided he wanted to sleep in his own bed.
 BTW, I didn't BF him in bed either!  It just hurt too much!  We had a big
comfy chair to nurse in back then, too.
Jay

PS  Not mad here!  Just wanted to make a point!  :)