Lori asks us about breastfeeding your toddlers.

Well Lori, all I can tell you, is that a first time Mum, currently still 
nursing almost 33 month old toddler, everything you've read about the 
benefits in your references are just so true!

But aside from all the a good science stuff, about the continued brain 
building properties of my milk, about how it adjusts fats to meet my 
toddlers needs etc - there is a whole range of other stuff that doesn't 
often get mentioned.  I sort of put it under 'mothering' in my head, or 
'parenting', as raising a breastfeeding toddler is just so much easier 
with Mama's Milk.  All those bumps and frustrations and tantrums that 
cannot be avoided - Mama's Magic Milk heals all.  When fevers strike, 
and sick toddlers refuse all but comfort - Mama's Magic Milk comes to 
the rescue.  My son recently had a10 days of sustained fever, vomiting 
and diarohhea - and he escaped hospitalisation because of Mama's Magic 
Milk.  Without it, he'd had been on a drip in hospital, with me frantic 
in the chair beside him.  I reminded myself of this when I felt 
exhausted by constantly nursing him to see him throw up or when I was 
smelling what was exploding out the other end.  No matter how hard it 
was to keep holding him, and nursing him almost constantly, it would 
have been so much worse to be trapped in a hospital chair beside as he 
lay with a drip in his arm.

My son inherited my small ear canals - nursing him still saves him from 
painful ear infections, as the action of suckling helps him keep 
everything clearer.  He's escaped anti-biotics many times - because he 
was nursing.  My doctor has trusted me several times, on giving the ear 
infections a bit more time to clear naturally... as I knew nursing was 
his best chance of getting away with it.

And on top of the huge biological benefts to me - the ceasing of my 
menstrual cycle for two and a half years after he was born, and the 
constant Joy Juice I get from his nursing, and the extra protection from 
breast cancer I'm receiving - there are the huge psychological benefits 
both of us are reaping.  The sheer level of day to day skin to skin 
close bonding we get, the continued dance between the two of us as we 
negotiate boundaries on my breasts and his needs as he ages, seeing the 
glow in his face as I fill him up with comfort on bad days .. it's just 
sheer joy.   Lying in a drowsy daze of a morning, and feeling him nuzzle 
and latch on in his sleep - following the same pattern on baby led 
latching he did when he was one minute old - is just awesome.  It's less 
awesome when he's all night nursing again due to illness or fever - but 
again, I skip in my head to what I'm being saved!   I see his sense of 
safety, and security, and joy in life, develop as he nurses.  He knows 
he has magic milk to return to, and he feels save and warm and loved.  I 
know he has magic milk to soothe him, and I look at the perfection of 
his body and marvel that I made it that way!  No matter what the future 
holds for him, I know I'm giving him the best I possibly can, for him to 
respond to both the physical, and emotional, needs of his future.  And 
that fulfills me in so many ways.

No panic for this toddler mother when fussy eating habits kicked in!  No 
worry about how little, or how much he eats, or when he only eats the 
bread, or only eats the meat!  I don't have to worry one jot about 
anything in his diet - for between my milk and the bits he does eat - 
he's fine.  No swapping 'tricks and secret's with other mothers for "how 
to get them to eat" for me.  No forcing him to eat when he doesn't want 
to - no clearing of plates 'or else'.  Food is a totally relaxed event 
in this household - even if we have to strip him naked to survive the 
spectacle of him eating his own body weight in spaghetti bolognese.  (We 
run the bath before we sit down to eat)

And there is nothing quite so laughter filled in the Universe, as the 
sound of a toddler playing 'boob raspberries' on his mother's breast.  
When his sense of joy overspills him to the point where he blows down on 
me and makes ffarrrumping noises, and me and his Dad dissolve into 
helpless giggles.  :-)  Or the shared joke I have with my hubby, about 
my litte boy's nightime latching on to my bum - or my husband's bum - as 
he once more latched utterly in his sleep, and simply snuffled around 
warm flesh until something soft and round came his way!   It is just 
amazing watching that hardwired behaviour still in action nearly three 
years later.

And lest you think I'm some super dooper lactation Goddess.  
Breastfeeding did nothing for me for a whole nine months: it was just 
what I did to feed my baby.  At about the nine months mark, he became 
physically active enough for me to _see_ what it meant to him.  I fell 
in love with nursing him because of the joy and contentment I saw 
written on his body, and on his face, and in his eyes.  Having seen what 
it meant to him, how could I not fall in love with it too?  Only this 
amount of love could have gotton me through the "throw the baby through 
the wall" stages of touched out and burned out!  It's not always easy, 
but it is always worth it.  It has put me in touch with my own power as 
a woman, and as a mother: the ultimate expression of feminist 
liberation.  (As a wonderful breastfeeding icon now puts it "My 
superpower is making milk, what's yours?")

My little boy came as a happy and relaxed bundle of 'sunflower' baby.  
He still nurses all through the day, and quite a lot at night.  It's 
just what he does: it's his joy.  It's mine too.  And I never thought 
I'd even understand that, never mind feel it.  My husband, having 
witnessed this shared joy first hand, is as passionate as I am about 
continuing to give our son my milk - for as long as he needs it.

I'm so happy that I rejected Western Premature Weaning, and went for 
normal nursing patterns.  Sure, there are some days when I wish he was a 
bit more like the more common pattern of 33 month olds - and nursed a 
lot less!  But mostly, I just thank the Gods we're still in this state 
of primal conjoining.  It will be a sad and sorry day for this mother, 
when her infant moves off without her.  :-(  I'm already planning a 
weaning ceremony, so I can grieve fully for what I'm losing, as well as 
rejoice for what I've gained in my wonderful son. 

Feel free to quote me.  :-)   I am aware that I have become "one of 
those women" - the ones you avoid as they're still doing that crazy 
breastfeeding stuff, and _revelling_ in it!  ;-)

Morgan Gallagher

Lori Passwater wrote:
> Hello, my name is Lori Passwater and I am a nursing student with Ivy Tech 
> College.  We are currently in our Maternal-Child class and discussing 
> breastfeeding.  I am really interested in the topic of mothers breastfeeding 
> their toddlers. ....  I am interested to hear any 
> other opinions on this subject.
>   

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