Just a wee bit tongue-in-cheek...
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TOP REASONS TO BREASTFEED:

Giant multinational pharmaceutical and food companies are spending millions
upon millions of dollars to isolate, research, and patent the components of
human milk.  Their goal is to make a profit on what you can already give
your baby without their "help."

The $1500-2000 you would have spent on formula in one year can go into a
tax-deferred educational spending account, giving you a head start on
saving.  And since your baby's intended IQ will be protected by
breastfeeding, it's likely that you'll need that money one day.

You prefer not to worry that your child's nutritional and emotional needs
aren't being met.  

Other family members will learn creative and loving ways to interact with
your baby without using feedings as an easy way out.  

A sudden emergency such as an ice storm, hurricane, power outage, or
boil-water advisory will not put your child's food source at risk.  

TOP REASONS NOT TO BREASTFEED:

Because your breastfed baby will not get as sick as often, you will miss the
opportunity to get to know your pediatrician really well. You'll probably
miss the same bonding relationship with an allergist as well.   Ditto on the
dentist.  And the orthodontist as well.  

It doesn't bother you to spend extra money on things like insurance co-pays,
antibiotics, vitamins, stain removers, or specialized hypoallergenic
formulas.  

Stumbling about the kitchen bleary-eyed at 2am to warm a bottle for a
screaming infant sounds fun.  

You think it's simply adorable when a baby responds to the beep of a
microwave the same way a cat does for a can opener.  

You would consider refusing a free Mercedes because you would rather make
loan payments on a Yugo.  

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