Single Answer Mentality: The reason that books such as Ezzo, Hogg, Ferber 
etc are so popular. The reason that people tend to often flock to "one answer" 
politicians and religious leaders. The reason that, often, people are not given 
choices when making health care decisions. So many people are used to being  
GIVEN the answer, and the idea that there is often more than ONE answer 
that many are uncomfortable having to look at data, their own situation as 
unique and then make a decision based on myriad facts and ideas and 
changing situations. 

To many, being told, "This is what you do, to last detail. One way. No other 
questions or ideas need to enter your mind. WE will do all your thinking for 
you, and then, YOU will not need to take responsibility for any or all 
outcomes...." is what too many want to hear, in too many aspects of their 
lives. 

I see two types of clients, when it comes to this issue. One, who becomes 
quite uncomfortable, when I make statements such as "you can do this, or 
this, or this depending on how the baby and you respond during that day, that 
time of day, your and the baby's comfort level, or during any other variable." 
and those who *accept* the responsibility that decisions often have to be 
made and remade, based on what is happening at the moment, Mom's 
intuition, and changing variables. 

The Former get uncomfortable, and want a "one size fits all" answer, and 
solution, to apply in all situations. The Latter tend to accept that they have 
been given some Tools, and that these need to be applied "PRN" based on 
each individual situation. My HIPPA statement, which all clients sign, is 
reflective of this, and so is my, and many other HCPs practices. The problem 
comes in, when people who want that "one answer" can't accept the decision 
making process, and becomes overwhelmed at this prospect. I am NOT blaming 
these Moms, they were probably rarely allowed any choices, or were never 
offered choices in most spheres of their life. The understanding that raising a 
child is an "Essay" test rather than a "right answer" test needs to often be 
stressed. 

Of course, often, when I have tried to address the "one answer" parents with 
a written regimen, (trying to make it as flexible as possible) it is not liked, and 
I hear, "There isn't only one 'right' way to raise a baby." ARGHGHGHHHHH!!!!! 
That is what I was saying, but that doesn't mean there are absolutely NO "less 
than adequate ways" to take care of a baby. It doesn't mean, "It doesn't 
matter what you, as a mother, do, or how you feed your child. There are still 
some guidelines, which we know to be true." 

I don't have a complete answer. Because there aren't any "complete" answers. 
But, IMO, those clients who are flexible and accept that they are the ultimate 
decision makers, and understand "what worked today, may need to be 
amended tomorrow" is just a basic part of parenting (As well as Relationships, 
Politics, etc.) are a LOT more pleasant to work with, and more importantly 
than that, tend to be more successful at Breastfeeding and all around 
parenting. 

JMO, your mileage may vary. 

Of course, there are guidelines. These are essential.  That is why we use 
Evidence Based and time honored techniques, without guidelines, and, 
sometimes, "experts" of at least some type, there would be too much 
frustration or lack of proper knowledge, that babies and mothers could be 
harmed. (After all, why bother with an IBCLC, if one doesn't realize that most 
mothers are not going to spend the years, and decades learning every possible 
situation, and technique, and so, often do need our help, and seek out 
a "professional" or "expert" in us?)  But, we keep open minds, and read new 
data with open, yet questioning minds. But, still, after being given these Tools, 
being able to apply then, according to changing situations, is the Essence of 
Parenting, along with a lot of other relationships and decisions. 

I'll stop now. ;) 

Mary Jozwiak IBCLC, RLC, LLLL
Private Practice 

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