>
>
>I believe the point she is trying to make is that while breastfeeding might
>be physically and emotionally pleasurable to some women at some times, (1)
>it isn't always and we shouldn't make blanket statements about this, (2)
>more importantly, many physically pleasurable sensations have nothing to do
>with sex, sexual arousal, or erotic thoughts and feelings, and (3) the
>pleasurable feelings one may derive from breastfeeding are not sexual nor
>should they be confused as such.
>

When I come across someone who is feeling "pleasure" while bf, and seems
to be uncomfortable about this, I make several comments.  I have read
the chapter "Beauty and the Breast" in the book "Breastfeeding:
 Biocultural Perspectives" and I do point out things like how different
cultures see different body parts as being sexual (feet, breasts,
hips...) and I mention that if we're brought up thinking we ought to get
sexual pleasure from our breasts, it can be hard to turn that idea off
to begin with.  I then go into how pleasure can be very far from sexual
in some instances, talking about such things as coming in from a cold
rain, dripping wet, peeling sopping wet clothes off one's self
(pleasureable to do that!), taking a hot bath (pleasurable!), drinking a
mug of hot chocolate, or herbal tea, or coffee (insert favourite hot
drink) by a roaring fire, which is also pleasurable.  I liked Kathy's
mention of a foot rub...and I talk about having one's hair brushed, or a
back massage.

Most of these things can be incorporated into sexual play if one wants
to (backrub by one's significant other as some sort of "foreplay", or
making love in front of a fire), but are not intrinsicantly seen as
sexual if one hears someone talk about a backrub, or a hot bath, or
whatever.  I used to love having my hair brushed when I was little by my
mother, and it was far from sexual in that circumstance...but take that
hair brushing and add it to the list of things one's partner does
fondly, gently, before lovemaking, and the whole *feeling* is entirely
different.

I think it is entirely possible for some people to get sexual pleasure
out of breast fondling by their partner, in one situation, and to then
go on and nourrish a baby and feel pleasure which is nothing sexual,
while nursing the baby.  The action is similar, but the person is
different, and does things with their own personal "flair" and way of
doing things, and that makes all the difference, in my opinion.

And of course, for people who feel no sexual pleasure at all at having
their breasts fondled, that is normal, in my eyes, but growing up in a
society where breasts are seen as sexual, it becomes necessary to be
able to differentiate between different types of pleasure if one wants
to be able to "switch it on" in some circumstances, then off again later.

Fio
ressource person with Allaitement Québec
nursing mama to Sandrine, 27 mos, and #2, 11/2002

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