Betsy asked what "medical" breastfeeding is, and there have been some great
responses to that question.  As I read Nikki's post about being praised for
bathing an elderly patient against her will, it brought to mind another
answer to that question.

Nikki's story made me think of all the parenting programs and philosophies
that encourage the use of force. Child won't sleep alone?  Force her to be
alone in a room at night anyway.  Baby begging to be cuddled?  force him to
be by himself, otherwise you'll reinforce the begging behavior.  Baby
showing hunger signs?  force him to remain hungry until the schedule says
it's time to eat.

It seems that parenting, education, medicine and affairs of state are all
prone to this "philosophy" of force and coercion.  Patient won't do what we
tell her to?  Find a way to make her do it.  Student doesn't perform as
expected?  He'll get a failing grade.  Another sovereign nation doesn't do
things the way we want them to?  Drop bombs and invade.  

In this context, I see a *world* of difference between "medical"
breastfeeding and normal breastfeeding.  It is both fortunate and sad that
breastfeeding can easily fit into a very coercive brand of parenting. 
Fortunate, of course, because it means more babies are breastfed.  Sad, of
course, because those of us who have been transformed by breastfeeding wish
that this experience would be as fundamentally life changing for everyone as
it has been for us.

In all the coercive models above, a regimen is valued over the human being
upon whom it is being exercised. But when a mother and baby are not
separated after birth, and are encouraged to breastfeed ad lib, a mother
learns a radical lesson:  Coercion is not necessary. There is no conflict
between honoring her child's wishes and meeting his needs.    

This can set the tone not only for nursing pair's relationship, but also for
their lives.

When any of us help mothers and babies get off to this sort of start, we're
   transforming society.  Two by two, these nursing pairs are learning to
value communication and individual autonomy over force and manipulation.  

The ripple effect?  Well, when these mothers and their children go on in
life to work in medicine, education, government, and even the military, they
just might be able to re-imagine hospitals, schools and nations in which
those who have power share it with those who have little, and people engage
in the radical practice of hearing one another and striving for consensus.

Lest this sound overly optimistic, we do have examples.  Jennifer Tow just
wrote about a successful peer counseling program that put many of these
principles into practice. Jennifer Tieman wrote about how she lives out
these values in her medical practice. And I had the privilege of working at
The Writing Center at Bucknell University, where we operated robustly within
this framework. Most of you reading this, I'm sure, have examples of your own.

The difference between normal breastfeeding and medical breastfeeding is, in
many cases, nothing short of the difference between learning to change the
world and learning that, unless we use force, we are powerless to change
anything at all. 

Kerry Ose

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