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From:
Sulman Family <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
Lactation Information and Discussion <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Wed, 27 Dec 1995 20:56:15 +0500
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For Sandy, working with the mother of 2 1/2 week old twins and a 16 month
old:  Just for fun, let's add a few more stresses such as Christmas, etc.
This mother is essentially trying to learn how to nurse, as her first
experience didn't go very well.  We mothers expect so much of ourselves!  I
would guess that this mother feels really overwhelmed, and with good
reason.  Is there any way to cut down on all the other demands on her for
this next week, so that she can concentrate on nursing and sleeping?  Is
there a way that she can get full-time help for right now, of a
"supportive-of-breastfeeding" type?  I would try to help her know that
breastfeeding is a learning time for mother and babies, and it may take
even 6 weeks to get it all running more smoothly.  She should not judge it
by this very intense first few weeks, but just take one day at a time.  The
real delights of nursing twins come after this initial period, if she can
make it through this early time.  I wonder if she can make a kind of
comfortable "nest" area - on her bed, or on the couch,or a big "Lazy-Boy"
type of chair, with plenty of pillows, food and fluids for herself handy.
This can be her "command center" if it is necessary for her to continue
running the household.  Then let other people do all the other things that
need doing, like meal preparation, laundry, fending off guests, diaper
changes, active or outside play for the toddler, etc.  She probably also
could use help from another adult getting Baby B latched on while Baby A is
nursing.  Sometimes it works to get the better nurser going first, to
stimulate the letdown, then get the second baby on, unless the rush of milk
is overwhelming Baby B.  It does feel to many mothers like they need 6
hands to do this at first, but as the babies grow, learn to latch on and
stay on, gain better coordination and head control, it will get easier.
Many mothers find a nursing pillow helps.  Others do fine with just plenty
of ordinary pillows. Having to pump and/or use a supplementary system can
be overwhelming at this stage, so I would try to encourage Baby B at the
breast and eliminate all those extras as soon as possible.  Some mothers
feel most adept using the football (clutch) hold while others hold both
babies in cradle holds or one cradle and one clutch hold.  Whatever works
for her right now.  She can gradually learn to try a variety of positions
so that she does not get plugged ducts and mastitis.  (More common with
twins).  Have her switch sides so that the better nurser stimulates the
milk supply in both breasts. If she has too much milk, she does not have to
use both sides for each baby at each feeding, just switch the next feeding.
If she feels she can't tackle two at once right now, she may want to try
again in a few days when she gets Baby B a little more adept at nursing.
Often, identical twins nurse together better than fraternal, and are more
likely to have similar sleep-wake cycles.  Encourage her
to hang loose and see what works best for her, day by day, rather than
following someone else's rigid expectations.
See if you can help this mother get all the sleep possible, even in small
catnaps.  For her 16 month old, it may help if she can have 2 dolls or
stuffed animals for this little one to cuddle and care for alongside Mom
and the 2 babies.  Some mothers have found that sitting on the floor to
nurse helps a toddler sibling feel closer than when Mom is up on a chair
with her arms full of 2 babies and the toddler is down at floor level.
(After she feels more adept at nursing). Maybe some favorite lullaby tapes
that all can listen to together will help, too.  But really, another
familiar, caring adult is of top priority to "mother" the whole group right
now.  I think we must be the only culture that doesn't see this, and that
thinks we should do it all by ourselves!
Karen Gromada's book, "Mothering Multiples," has many very helpful
suggestions and is written in a caring and comforting style.
Good luck to her, and keep us posted.

Anne Altshuler, RN, MS, IBCLC and LLL Leader of a group for mothers of
twins in Madison, WI  (I had twins (now age 12) with a 3 year old, a 12
year old and a 14 year old, and wish I could have learned to let go of some
of the many things I felt were essential for me to do in those early days!)

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