I am married to a smoker, who smokes about two packs per day.  Thank goodness,
for our children's sake and mine, he goes out of doors here in sunny south
Florida to do so.
  It might help to mention to the mother that the nicotine patches are now
available  in the US without prescription (they run around $50) and are
designed to gradually wean the mother from the nicotine.   The level of
nicotine in mothers using the patch is less than mothers who are smoking,
generally speaking (per Hale '98) but the mother must be cautioned NOT to
smoke *and* use the patch - could be a bad trip for both her and baby.
Quitting works best with *behavior modification* as well.  As for asking a
smoking mother whether she would take a drag on a cigarette and blow the smoke
in her baby's face, she would probably *say* NO, but in reality would do just
such a thing many times in the day if she is smoking two packs in her waking
hours and caring for small children.  She can't leave them unattended for
three or four minutes two or three times per hour which is what a 2-packer
does ( based on keen observation in my own home, unfortunately) so chances are
very good that the children are being exposed to regular doses of second-hand
smoke.   She probably also smokes in the car, albeit with the window cracked.
Her toddler may eat a few cigarette butts along the way, also.
  I know it is very hard to quit - my husband has been smoking since he was a
*fetus* - but no one ever died a long, agonizing death from terminal
"bitchiness".

Lisa Jones in HOT Wellington FL