I was breastfed for 7.5 mos, and weaned "cold turkey" because that was
the only solution the ped had for my mom's situation (I would ask to
nurse every 15-30 min. at night, only until letdown, then come
off...this had been going on since I was about 4 mos...perhaps OSS/OALD?).
My brother received my mom's milk for about 10 days (hand expression)
before she got an abcess in BOTH breasts and threw her hands up in
frustration. He was then nourrished with cow's milk mixed with corn
syrup in a bottle with a large hole cut out of the teat. He had a
bilateral cleft lip and palate (a wide one) and they couldn't get him to
latch.
My mother says she doesn't really think she can feel ANGER at anyone for
what happened back then, because "society wasn't yet *there*", if you
know what I mean, but she sure does feel regrets. She regrets not
knowing of the LLL (this in 75 and 76, when they did exist, and probably
did exist where she was living)...she has said she thought babies need
their moms' milk for about 18-24 mos at the time, so I would have likely
gone on a lot longer. Again, she regrets not knowing someone to help
her out getting a pump (if there was one!) and helping her continue to
give my brother expressed milk longer, or maybe showing her how to hand
express correctly (she was doing it herself, self-learned), and maybe
give him more time at the breast, even if he wouldn't have been able to
latch. But she feels no guilt, and feels only happiness that I have
managed to get to the WHO's recommendations (and beyond), and knows that
I will let my daughter decide when her time is up.
My MIL also seems to feel happy for us, but I think she has many more
mixed feelings (that she probably thinks are guilt) and is much more
defensive of bottle feeding if one should so much as mention "benefits"
of breastfeeding. However, she is interested in knowing more about
breastfeeeding and what is normal often, when we talk. She didn't nurse
my DH at all (it was not even "reccomended" to her, in 72) and my SIL
got nursed half-hazardly for about 9 days before she decided her milk
wasn't any good. She now knows that wasn't true, and I've said to her
it's not her fault for either of them, but I think not having ANY real
successful bf relationships with her children probably damaged her
psyche more...I know that my mom still feels that for the era, she did
well to nurse me 7.5 mos, with no support really (except perhaps her MIL
who lived half way around the world and she didn't see often!).
Fio.
Nursing Mama to Sandrine, 28 mos, and #2, 11/2002
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